So I saw this on the TV at the gym today and the closed captioning literally read:
Anthony -scare emoji-

...

lol stupid fuck

Fan behind Loria: What a fucking snake.

Cam Newton is clearly to blame.

No way the Steelers live in a glass house, that would make it impossible for Big Ben to rape anyone.

Let me translate this from Hollywood-speak into English:

I was a DARE medal winner and I turned into a pothead so... yeah, maybe let’s not use our resources there.

Assange is nothing more than a Russian agent at this point.

I’ve never seen or heard of Don Trump Jr. We may have spoken once, probably.

FARA and the FEC would beg to differ.

If you want Articles of Impeachment in 2019, you better vote in 2018.

#ButHisEmails is already a thing. I die.

Well it’s a good thing they got him for special teams.

Which is...kinda the point of the article? They don’t have to say anything, so why choose to say something, and then say something so insipid.

‘Low energy Apple and Google must give Russia codes to defeat terror and show I won election fairly, covfefe.’

Or like appointing Betsy DeVos as education secretary.

Nah.

The Podesta thing’s a lot funnier than just some dudefight. Trump is so desperate to divert his base’s attention from his Putin meeting he’s just stringing together random shit about the Hillary/DNC emails even if it makes absolutely zero fucking sense.

Joint Security: an old cigar box hastily tossed under the bed.

Trump’s got a thing for being a fucking prick.