It’s because of this kind of shit that anytime someone in Portland introduces themselves as from Nike, I look at them like they’re a Scientologist.

Sounds exactly like The Oregonian in Portland.

A Lannister always finishes his checks.

There’s typically a construction contingency budget line, but they might have already burned through it on this.

Porn.

When you’re high in a grocery store you just buy everything.

The Motel 6 I’ve stayed in was terrible, but the $300 room service literally blew my mind!

It’s worth noting that even though he’s 31, he hasn’t played in a few years so the wear-and-tear part of his overall physical conditioning equation is definitely on his side.

It should be perfectly normal to shame people in public for spending more than thrift store prices on coolers - you’re not carrying transplant organs, people.

It should be perfectly normal to shame people in public for spending more than thrift store prices on coolers -…

Thanks, cunning linguists!

I’m still glad we’ll get to see him next fall.

HIS VEINS WERE GLOWING GREEN LIKE THE HULK ON THE DEVIL LETTUCE

To be fair, this was like his third choice wish behind “give me my starting job back” and “introduce Dak Prescott to Tanya Harding.”

</humanity>

Makes that box a Briq (da da da da) house!

lez dox dis Tami bish.

+1 funeral

Perhaps you should look at cities a bit differently - seeing as they’re the places services will return to first after a disaster, the places aid will be given out most readily, and generally be the places with more goods, services, and people like doctors to help you out of a jam. If it’s a non-evacuation scenario…

These idiots want me to load flash player to see their butthole...shoulda learned from Pornhub that I require my buttholes presented in HTML5 only.

Maybe if it wasn’t wearing a hoodie it wouldn’t get shot at.