Shhhh, go, go, go, go. I bet it feels mechanical in this hand

Can’t we just drop a few nukes into Mars’ core and restart the magnetic field? ;)

Hmm nothing beats a fresh bearded clam

The fifth of cheap vodka I swilled down last night could be why I’m sick today, but nah, I’m going with “food poisoning”

Little shit should have learned to zig zag

My 18 year old self firmly agrees with this statement

Bill Belicheck approves of this article

As a fat, balding 40 something, I resemble this remark

It’d also help if so many sequels weren’t basically a retelling of the original movie, just with a different villain. You built the world in the first movie, now have some fun in it

But are they all good boys/girls?

I don’t know the Fredrick’s of Hollywood catalog back in the day worked pretty well too.

It’s Wingardia Levi-ohhhh-sa not Wingardia Levio-sa

At least he didn’t introduce himself by saying something like “How, me Chief” and was played by someone who was actually was Native American (or in this case First Nation, since he’s Canadian), so yeah progress?

You can’t fix stupid

Yeah I’m not sure how well your lawsuit would go when the first question the Judge asks is “Did you follow the numerous warning signs telling you that you were overheight?”

Step 5 - READ THE ARTICLE BEFORE COMMENTING

No idea why but Apache Chief was my favorite “Super Friend” even though his was most definitely a second tier character

Sad to say but do you really think for most Americans the distinction between Blackfoot and Apache is enough to not just call him “Apache Chief”?

Apache Chief, Apache Chief, Apache Chief, Apache Chief!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tell me you didn’t read this with the CHiPs theme song playing in the back of your head