"Church" for where you check your watch...

she's right! in fact, it's not just food stamps that make it too easy. Grocery stores = dependence! Time to hunt for your food, America! Hunt for every. single. meal. Don't live near any wilderness? Hunt that rat! Eat that hobo! It's the American way.

I once got into a long argument with a commeter on Lifehacker who, in response to an article about coming out, said that anal sex is disgusting. I explained that, given the percentage of the population that is homosexual versus heterosexual and given what percentage of straight couples report having regular anal sex,…

We should also ban vomiting. IT'S ADAM AND EVE, NOT ADAM AND HEAVE.

I don't hate religious conservatives, I have some friends who are religious conservatives! But there's no need for them to flaunt their lifestyle choices in public and they should NOT be allowed to have children to indoctrinate.

Best thing I happened to see on Tumblr today:

If buttsex is so unnatural, then why is poop dick-shaped?

I've done it for all 75 of my abortions.

If you had come to my Starbucks, I would have addressed you by name AND called out sheepishly "OPRAH CHAI? FOR KATE!" You may have even gotten a joke.

Why can't we enjoy both? They're both great!

knowing me i would end in some kind of 2001 Space Odyssey HAL situation with me locked out of the house pleading for my life and the last thing i hear is, "I'm sorry BootlegGinger, I can't do that."

Worthless scum, I guess. I'll never understand people who see how much shitty stuff already happens in the world and say to themselves, "I want to make that even worse." Fucking worthless pieces of shit.

I just don't understand how people find this funny. Even before I had a child this shit wouldn't have been funny and now that I do it is terrifying. The first thought those panicked parents had was that someone was in their house hurting their child. That is so not fucking funny. I would be so traumatized because as a…

Are all installations by feminist artists feminist installations, or does making making feminist installations make you a feminist artist?

I can't imagine voluntarily going to a wedding.

Yeah, it just looks like an instagram filter, basically. He wasn't exactly photoshopped.

I'm sure it's just residual anger from the whole "Lena Dunham was photoshopped in Vogue OMG" screaming debacle here on Jezebel. Post processing has been done on photographs since the beginning of photography. What Jez is missing is the ability to differentiate between simple improvements and airbrushing people beyond…

I don't think his cheeks were even messed with. Clearly the color for the entire image was changed, not him specifically. As someone else pointed out it's super sunny in Australia and they were outside so it washes out everything. This made everything look like the colors they truly were. Complete nonstory.

I think we have established that to the writers of Jezebel, Photoshop is some magical voodoo, that was programmed by devil witches and demons that drink baby tear mochas.