I traveled to Europe in 1993 — at the very same time as the Balkan Wars! I was in the middle of it, in France, Germany and the Netherlands, a major player in that epic struggle for freedom. If the Serbs had found me, in Paris, they would have surely paraded my head on a spike down the streets of, I dunno, Lyon? The…

She ages in hyperbolic space, where 30 is the major axis.

But the stuff James Frey lied about was at least a little plausible, no?

How long has she been 29?

I think I read on twitter that her real age is closer to around 34-35 in real age, as opposed to “Hollywood” age. But clearly, she doesn’t have too many issues with fudging the truth...

Spoiler: he dead.

Heart of Darkness: needs more white ladies 2/10 would not read again

In tribute to Ms. Linton, I am also announcing my new memoir, recounting the time I sailed up the Congo River to search for a mysterious ivory trader named Kurtz.

Zambillion Little Pieces.

Sooooo, her bio says she’s currently 29, which makes her 12 years of age in 1999, the year she says she lived alone in “the jungle with big spiders and poor little children with AIDS and, and, and . . . insert cliche here.”

Disagree. If she's going after Murdoch, she's a planetary treasure.

Raise your hand if you feel personally attacked and victimized by Nigel Farage’s shoes.

I don’t care what anyone says, Lily Allen is a national treasure.

Demi! A willing and open partner is your body’s Burger King. So for the love of god, have it your way before you explode!

She bugs, her book bugged, she never stops bugging!! God, Julia Roberts has never been more perfectly cast. Dear Ones my ass.

All I really remember from the book was when she was hanging out with the monks or whatever she taught herself to take one bite of food at a time and to not think about the next bite, but enjoy the one in her mouth.

I would skip all the other sections and go straight for revenge. YEAH, GREAT, YOU LIVE IN AN ASHRAM, WHATEVER but NOW tell me about setting all of his sneakers on fire in a bathtub.

Eat, Prey, Kill

I hope he dies alone on a garbage barge.

FUCK Ian Connor forever and ever. In addition to being a rapist, dude has no talent, surfs by on other people’s waves, and is in general a tremendous douchebag. I hope he dies alone on a garbage barge.