Torch is a good guy, who is just missing the obvious by not knowing what he doesn’t know. This truck is for the guy, like me, who has a big camper to pull. A half ton truck these days has crap for payload capacity, which means almost any non-pod sized camper is either over the half ton truck’s actual payload, or it’s…

dude, that car is a biohazard scene...it’s just wrong not to handle it as such. so not cool putting the public and that driver’s family at risk.

wouldn’t own a vehicle that did that - or an auto stop/start one either for that matter. the beeps from the sensors are nice, but I’ll be in control of what crap I hit, thank you very much....sometimes that garbage can NEEDS a nudge with the bumper when it’s raining and I’m dressed for work.

With all due respect - as a former Uber driver - this really isn’t funny or cute at all.  I feel for that man, his wife and their baby, but their poor choices affect others.  This man’s car is now a Biohazard problem, requiring much more remediation than simply taking it to the carwash. Just getting that car detailed…

you’ve obviously never witnessed a baby being born.....that car is totaled.

this is not a serious column.....it’s comedy, bro-ham.

take that useless door off the passenger side, remove the useless seat, and BAM - keg hauler.  it’s not rocket appliances.

I was thinking enclosed trailer, not a utility trailer...wasn’t real clear. 

what he needs is a 5x8 trailer and a 2 wheel dolly....easy to customize, half his budget, and towable by anything they collectively own....but then again, this is a Jalopnik comedy thread, not a real ‘what should I buy’ thread.....so in that case, he needs a Miata.

yes, his ‘costs’ listed in a lot of cases I’m pretty skeptical of - I’ve never seen plug wires for $14 for anything as an example....if a lot of that was junkyard, I kind of get it from a cash accounting basis, but then again, time is money, and all that time is opportunity cost in my world.

I had a Duster with the 3.0 bought new in 1992 - at the time, it was decent compared to other options which were crap. But it was crap. Trans was crap. Brakes were crap. Car would snap oversteer on throttle lift like nobody’s business. Stereo was crap. Seats were crap. Paint was crap....but it was cheap, and better…

I agree - free country - free to be as stupid as you like. 

I’m the target market, and ain’t got the dough either even though I do, but would rather not live in a van down by the river later in life....shitmobile it is.

right - in other words, it is optimized in more than a single aspect (the point of a turbo in the first place), and it does what it’s supposed to do. How any given user (or even the majority of users) ACTUALLY drives the vehicle has little to do with how any given user (or the majority of users) COULD drive the…

My Expedition with the 3.5 eco is far to fast for what it is - the thing will do 75-100 on the highway to pass without even noticing and with half a throttle - and it will smoke the tires on command.....it WILL get the mileage listed, but that requires trying...and it’s much more fun to drive it harder and drink the…

true dat, my man.

ya, piss off...i pay the same taxes you do for the privilege of using the highways and roads.  

this or any side by side, on a trailer, is the right answer.

Idiosyncracies - while this thing has one too many doors for a proper shitmobile, and a good clearing stick will take care of the rest, it’s not rocket appliances to get this thing moving - third gear is normally used for driving, as the “drive” gear causes the car to go in reverse. Neutral parks the car, while…

in the classic sense - if it runs, starts, stops and turns without any frightening noticeable issues it’s worth $2500.   I don’t want it, but it’s Nice Price.