THAT SHITHOLE OF A COUNTRY IS HARRASSING AMERICAN HEROES - everyone here yesterday

A bronzed god with silver hair issues forth a golden shower.

Happy to help!

Not the idiot we want, but the idiot we deserve.

Now we now why the damn pool turned green

Well, Lochte might not be a good representative of America, but at least he’s an accurate one.

It’s almost like rape isn’t about sex, but power or control ...

.

failed to hand the baton to English Gardner.’

This is criminally underappreciated.

Pictured: IOC Spokesman

Seriously. “These kids.” Lochte is 32 fucking years old. Yes, he’s an idiot, but he’s a grown-ass idiot.

Holy shit. IOC spokesman is really angling for a new job as Sports Information Director for an SEC school.

To be fair, Lochte probably doesn’t know the difference.

Andrew Luck always sounds like he just drank a bunch of milk and has that milk phlegm in the back of his mouth.

Actually, Lochte and his three teammates all gave different stories to police, steadfast in their commitment to the medley relay.

I’m glad that Lochte and Feigen(apparently) are back on US soil. None of us know what really happened obviously but regardless, nothing good comes of two US Olympic athletes being ushered through the cesspool of corruption (and literal cesspool) that is Rio and its criminal justice system.

Reporter: Sorry, Steve. When I asked about, “that incredibly painful nut shot,” I was referring to Durant going to Golden State.

Adams: *Sobs uncontrollably*

It’s funny that it’s on a lot of people’s minds, though