Mine frequently looks like it’s been mauled by a cat. The joke’s on everybody else, though, because I’m 100% fine with my hair gaining sentience of its own and mauling men who comment on it.

I don’t for one moment pretend I don’t have it vastly easier than any woman in a video on the internet.

This is a nice response. The internet hoards will never be satisfied and will always feel entitled to comment on your appearance, as any female reporter can tell you. Heck, when I was doing on-camera reporting I was a slender, 20-something, 6' tall blonde with blue eyes straight out of central casting. I’m nobody’s…

Merci beaucoup

thank you so much for this tip! If i ran the world weeks would start on monday. I have this argument (that i never win) with my girlfriend all the time that the weeks are mon-sun. This is obvious, right? 

Jimmy John’s The Frenchie sandwich is tres bien.

Dear Salty Waitress,

What follows that? A 2 pound cannoli, obvs.

ISO 8601 says the first day of the week is Monday. According to timeanddate.com, only the US, Canada and Japan think Sunday is the first day of the week. 

Gwen obviously wins because not only is Pizza Michael Jordan, it’s Michael Jordan playing against high schoolers. It’s Ted Williams without losing four seasons to military service. It's Wayne Gretzky having more assists than anybody else ever had points. It was over after the first pick and everybody else was fighting…

Jucy Lucys for life!

Nope. That’s from a 15th century German fechtbuch (trans.: “fencing book”, basically an illustrated guide to sword fighting).

Despite what you might see in movies, ALL sword combat against an armored opponent was fought from half-sword, in which one hand is on the handle, and the other is on the blade. Since a sword…

Swedish Fish. One of the very, very few candy that I cannot stand at all.

You ok, man?

 You are right about so many things, but I’ll take a stand for hard boiled over scrambled. A properly hard boiled egg is so perfect at my desk mid-morning. A splash of hot sauce and some finishing salt- it is so superior to scrambled for me.

Over easy on top of a bowl of butter noodles dusted with some parmesan is heavenly! 

Ugh why is poached and over-easy on the same side of the bracket. That would be my runny yolk championship preferably with hash browns and toast. 

I was all ready to say something snarky in the comments until I saw that the dude is a Vietnam vet and the restaurant is his comfort and now I’m like “man, whatever gets you through.”

Bacon Avocado maki rolls. I also make spam rolls

Its not the fanciest but my go to Mustard is Plochmanns. You get so much for such a low price and it tastes great! Second would be Whataburger Mustard 

Its not the fanciest but my go to Mustard is Plochmanns. You get so much for such a low price and it tastes great!…