Stephanie, Here’s a cute squirrel pic I had saved. I call it “Step away from the bird feeder!”

Okay, I’m sorry but I can’t help myself:

I’m kind of disappointed in radishes today. I don’t know if it’s that my taste buds have changed or if radishes are being bred differently, but they don’t have the same sharp tang that they used to have. I didn’t like that as a child but I miss it now. And I hope you like my reply to being a picky eater.

Hey, I’ve been making haggis in condoms for years! It’s only fitting. What do you think they used sheep’s stomach for initially anyways?

It must have been ‘65 or ‘66 because I wasn’t more than 5 or 6 years old. My mother, dad and little brother were seated at the dining room table there in the first house I remember, on Culver Rd. in Rochester, NY. I had finished everything but the carrots. “You need to eat your carrots.” Mom said, “They’re good for…

You KNOW I’m just pulling your leg about frenching the cashews Ms. Robicelli! I did make the cashew chicken, though. That much was true.

Holy Crap! I just made cashew chicken 2 weeks ago for my housemate and his new girlfriend. She has more tattoos than Guns and Roses, so I wanted it to be right. I got my recipe from an old paperback wok cookbook from the 80's. I used cornstarch and hoisin sauce. The cornstarch gave the chicken enough crispyness to…

The stick shrinks as you get older...alas, I’m 60 yrs old now.

Allison, you know I “Try” to be funny commenting on your posts but I wouldn’t touch this one with a six inch stick.

Okay, I know this is a women’s site, and mostly I usually other Jalopnic sites. It seems many of the stories I have read are concerning food. Since I peruse The Takeout a lot I thought I’d give you all a man’s perspective on bad roommate behavior.

Okay, I’m being serious this time. I made banana bread last month. I sliced up dried dates and pecans to spice it up. My recipe called for only baking soda instead of a combination of soda/powder. When it came out it tasted great, but I swear I detected that the bottom of the loaf was denser than the top. Could that…

Sgt.. Stedenko! Is that you? I’m listening to a Betty board right now. Remember the day?! If you can’t call me out on the use of an adjective as a noun; well I don’t know. It looks like you just created your account 5 minutes ago. Are you still wearing those plaid jackets? Honestly, they never go out of style. They…

Okay, now this was a LONG time ago in a State far far away. My friend, who lived below me with his girlfriend got the idea that we should try our hand at growing, er, stuff... verboten. We rode our mountain bikes then hiked far into the country. We found beautiful verdant fields with old field stone walls. It was a…

Allison, you’re a cheeky dame with a lot of moxy. And now you’re making me learn how to use the Google:

You know I’m just kidding. I love gnocchi.

Star Trek IV Captain Kirk (now made younger by technology):

Thanks Marnie. I was pretty amazing back then too in my little jammys. But I was 6 years old and things have changed in the last 54 years. Now I need a new hip; and have no aunts to pinch my 😢 cheeks.

It would have to be something like Kaboom cereal which I don’t think has been made in years; or maybe Captain Crunch. I would be wearing jammies with the little feet on them and there were tiny plastic stars and moons on the bottom supposedly for traction.

It’s this one here:

Actually I brandished the cleaver at him and yelled with a Japanese accent: