Arthur Dent? The Arthur Dent?

Can I do parkour anymore?

Those trend lines are made up. The "white" trend line for topping the Billboard Hot 100 exceeds the data it supposedly fits by every measure: the deviations on the low side are larger, the number of points below the curve is larger, and the mean of the data is a full 5 points less than the mean of the curve supposedly…

You can't expect dragons in movies to understand that what they're doing isn't real, that they're just incinerating a stand-in, sometimes five takes a day. Their esophaguses would be cauterized shut by a schedule like that. Smaug rested for centuries between bloodbaths.

When it's 5:15 in Nepal, it's 5:00 in India. A comprehensive list of where and when it's not 5:00 anywhere would be terribly long, once you incorporate daylight savings and time zones offset by half or a quarter of an hour, not that that affects your point in any substantial way.

I'm skeptical of the stretch goals of "Vonnegut Park" and three all-new interviews.

Everybody wants their baby Beck, even those for whom it's not physically possible.

Guacamole that has been exposed to air and turned gray is not a health hazard, but it is evil and will corrupt your soul.

Do you remember when that was what people meant by trolling, and that other stuff was called flamebait, and the ferry to Shelbyville cost a bee? People kept missing the distinction between a joke someone might miss if they didn't pay attention and something merely meant to make people angry enough to respond, and…

Archangel Gabriel.

It's great that they're making movies and television for the hearing impaired.

The props department can't afford real stones, so they lampshade it. "By sacred degree, the apostate infidel shall be STONED until dead.

Who didn't dream of being a squeegee guy when they grew up?

Emojis are cutesy ways to express emotions, and the subject matter most associated with cutesy ways to express emotions is not overdue TPS reports. The communications of a person who hasn't had an overdue TPS report in years may make sparse use of TPS-report-related iconography.

The statement seems perfectly patriotically correct, as you put it, but it's not actually correct. And he did it on purpose, unlike Rather's foul-up, which I'd have been willing to write off because being called out for poor research on a story after decades on the job sounds like praising with faint damnation to me.

The solution is to put fluoride in our vaccines and distribute them to everyone through chemtrails. I am confident people will feel safer being exposed to that kind of a delivery system, and we'll kill two birds with one stone.

As the Times article alludes to, immigration and visits outside the country confound the issue of why outbreaks would occur at any particular location in the US. I don't know what it means, but it makes the data harder to analyze.

Speaking as a Democrat, that poll doesn't prove what you said.

Like undeserved condescension, for that matter.

They want to trick you into revealing their graves.