Sounds like you have a lot of anger in you. Maybe you should just let it go.

Who wants to sneak a flask in with me so we can get wasted in the front row?

Bernie Bros across the land are leaving the room to get some clean underwear after they spontaneously jizzed themselves over this news. this very infinitesimally small blip in a large pile of delegates he’ll need to win.

Yeah but can we talk about how Chris Hayes called Sanders “Bernie Sandwiches” on live tv

I could be Albert Einstein and they would discredit me as a horrible scientist. It doesn’t matter.

• “Hang your collection of straw hats in your hall instead of smart wallpaper.”

Smart people can be sick fuckers too

I think the article here does a pretty good job of explaining, even without clicking through to the links.

Yup. It’s kind of the main reason we need her.

This is why I like her and would vote for her if I could. I know the arguments against her and why she shouldn’t be nominated but damn, she knows her way around.

So, basically, it’s like everytime you try to have a faculty meeting. Everyone is never free on the same night.

“I sure hope — we’re in Bernie Sanders’ backyard here in New Hampshire — I sure hope he intends to show up in his neighboring state”...“There is nothing worse than a debate about debates.”

I imagine Diane Keaton coming to the photo shoot, seeing all the ball gowns, and saying “yeah but maybe I should just wear like a cute hat or something...”

I recently visited Tokyo and they’re such efficient walkers, it was painful to come back here to the land of inconsiderate assholes who can’t move to the side.

What’s more likely is that they’ll say that the department has failed at fulfilling the goals set out for it and how could they possibly trust them with more money and they’ll cut the budget instead.

“Clitrash” is acceptable language but “shit” would jus be vulgar

My pediatrician friend recently got a mug that says “Your google search is no substitute for my medical degree.” I can only imagine how often she hears that crap.

I always fantasized about being some kind of liberal, social-justice Cthulhu, walking around people like that, imposing the true knowledge of reality directly into their minds by my mere presence, and driving them to hair-tearing madness as their brains struggle futilely to rationalize it.

“I like him because he’s a businessman,” said North Carolinian Linda Wilkerson. “He does what he says he’s going to do. I’ve seen him lose a ton of money and bounce back. We’re in terrible financial debt. I hope he can bail us out.”

Just asked to be moved - they only allow a small number of animals so that people with allergies can be accommodated. My dad and grandpa are allergic to perfumes and have had issues on planes.

Why raise hell? It’s super stressful to move with a pet, why be a jerk to someone?

I am so sick of humans being unnecessarily…