This is the hottest take I can think of: It’s OK not to like things.

nobody actually likes any Queen songs.

Ouch. That one cuts close to the bone.

I am putting on my Spiritual Underoos!

I would 4th, 5th and 6th these damns.

My heart aches Sarah

While this information reveals the racial divide in America, it may soon be overshadowed by my groundbreaking study showing that eating a Krispy Kreme doughnut while drinking whiskey and smoking a joint rolled in bacon as you dance in your underwear to Prince’s “Kiss” can help fight depression.

Well, this was floating around Twitter this morning so...

OK seriously this is a thing, right? Because all my fricking forks are GONE! I swear six months ago I had a dozen forks, now I have three! I thought it was just me.

I swear if I am ever invited to the White House while Trump is in office, I WILL shit on the White House lawn. It would be worth being tackled by the Secret Service and going to jail. Totally worth it.

This isn’t any other issue than people going out to vote. Half of the eligible voters in this country do not bother, and that is in a GOOD year. Those are the people I am talking about. Period. Full stop.

Which is why everyone who thinks this tangerine turd is bad needs to fucking VOTE! The biggest chance of Trump winning a second term is eligible voters who stay home. Trust me, the Trumpvangelicals will be out, will you?

Huh, by this standard the year I spent drinking in Korea counts as serving in the Gulf War. Trust me, I saw some shit go down! I lost a lot of buddies, I found them in the morning, usually passed out in the hall, but for a couple of hours, I lost them.

You still get to be white.

Sorry folks, the country is closed the orange racist moose out front should have told you.

Hell, many of us are also heavily armed!

Wait ... is this The Man? Like literally, in the flesh? If that is, in fact, The Man, should I take a selfie with him?

I know far too much about Trump’s sex life. Far. Too. Much.

Look, I am as much a fan of banjo and fiddle-friendly covers as the next Mayosapien, but if I EVER hear this I will personally track down the perpetrators and smack the mayo out of their hands.

Ah, yes, Taylor has arrived at the cookout and look, everyone, she brought potato salad!