My two year-old little boy is called Jude. He did a massive poo (*shitti*? 🤔) this morning preceded by a huge fart (*farty*? 🤔). It was nasty. But he’s no bitch. We both take offence - nay, we take UMBRAGE- on your behalf at emailer “Shz” et al and their pffffffffffffffffffttttttblahblahfuckingblaaaaaah.

Hi: I’m Australian. Here to tell you that we all know Assange is loose AF. Always has been.

I actually think William is a host too.

I get it. I’m white. I’m not American. I don’t live there, but I get what you mean. How could you possibly know who to let your guard down in front of when ultimately, more than half of the white women who voted at this election did so KNOWING that they weren’t just voting against their own interests, but that they…

Lysistrata: now there’s a REAL blast from the past.

It’s the colour de jour for teapots, darling!

Does he call the pot ‘jet’ coloured or ‘midnight’? Yet reserve a direct description of the kettle’s colourway?

Exactly. Ketrina Ketts. Everybody knows this. And her daughter, the cracked coffee mug, Crack.

Oh God, thankyou for this. I felt very much as though I was being trolled by this article, or that I was about to become redundant as an English teacher 😳

I feel like this headline should say something along the lines of :

Per head of population I would say we have just as many disgusting horrible bigots as anywhere in the world. At the moment, it might be worse.

His Jim Morrison was the sexiest godamned thing I have ever seen in my entire life.

I love that the source talks about “Their” yacht. Excuse me. *They* don’t have a yacht.

Idris Elba gives me LAAAAIFE! ✊

OR with a handsome misfit guy from The City who taught a small town to dance again

This shit blows MY MIIIIIND. o_O

Why don’t we discuss it over a cheeseburger or some such?

Darn tootin’

Hey: now you just listen here. 2016 sucks. It sucks harder than a Dyson vacuum cleaner on a bowling ball in a shitty ‘check this out’ sales pitch infomercial, and I will NOT allow you to make ‘The Gilmore Girls’ into the free set of steak knives that go with the purchase of this suckhole of a year.

So I am from Australia and have never heard of this “Pat Robertson” before.