I'll just leave this here...

My Bf just said, "You can't tell me these freaky things, because I'm going to start doing them just to get a laugh. Wait, what are you typ—"

"...and him asking me to do something that my friends and I now refer to as 'the bugle'."

OH GOD, THE CAPE THING. I once hooked up regularly with a girl for a while who then broke it off to hook up with a guy with a hand-made cape and a coke pinkie. Sophomore year of college was not the highest point for my self-esteem.

* rides a unicycle around campus

bluff-diving?

I made out with a 17 year old my junior year of college and now that 17 year old is a DOCTOR so WHO IS THE SMART ONE NOW?!

When my daughter was three, and an only child at that point, I asked the mother of one of her preschool classmates how she handled having three. Without missing a beat she looked me in the eye and responded, "Scotch".

Being punched in the cervix is the worst pain ever. It's like a supernova of white, piercing pain that engulfs you from the inside out, and all that exists in the world is PAIN! And you want to puke. So yeah, the only thing a big penis is good for is impressing your guy friends

THAT'S THE GUN SHE USED WHEN SHE STOLE MY ICE CREAM.

A frat as a brother, a sorority as a sweetheart.

On the other hand, I bet that none of these girls have ever acted like FUCKING BONERS in front of the SIGMA NU BROTHERS at a SOBER EVENT!

I am a USD student and I would like to assure all of you Jezebel readers that WE ARE NOT PROTESTING THE DRAG SHOW!! In fact, it was totally sold out long ago and many of us were very bummed not to attend!

Not being from the US, I am utterly fascinated by sororities. In Ireland (where I'm from) there are clubs and societies you can join or not join but they obviously do not require the level of commitment sororities demand! May I ask, as a total outsider to this world, do all college students in the US join a sorority /…

I am of the opinion that this email was not deranged and that the sender had a right to be pissed. There is nothing more infuriating than making appointments with sorority girls and them not showing up. It would drive me crazy when I was an officer and that happened. Of course... I didn't send emails like that. But I…

Not gonna lie. I'm ridonkulously excited for this movie. I watched every episode of Pretty Wild (currently on Netflix!) in one of my persistent vegetative states, which luckily, only lasted for the duration of a rainy weekend. The script & Watson capture Alexis Neier's hilariously vapid spirituality to purrrfection.…

Moving on from the blatant misogyny of referring to all women as vaginas for a moment, is this guy seriously suggesting that because of my gender I am incapable of understanding intruder = run away?

Suddenly, scores of MRAs emerged from their hidey holes, ready to cry about how in a world where men are truly the oppressed class, this is an insult to their struggle. The struggle of the poor, underserved white male, who had to suffer the indignity of a prank.

Let's all Pin this article for future reference when Arkansas doesn't understand why their are so many single mothers, teen parents, the poverty rate is higher and a rise in disease. I seriously need a drink and this is why I shouldn't read Jezebel at work.

More than likely, that's exactly how it went down.