At first he panics, and then he's like, "WOOOHOOOOOO!"

I don't see what the big deal is, the cat is clearly making cookies at the end and that's a nice gesture if you ask me

FLAWLESS

I'm so surprised that a sorority sister would have a dramatic (and incoherent) reaction to playful criticism.

ghost dildo

Boy am I looking forward to when she figures out what cookies are. The computer ones. And the chocolate chip ones, if she doesn't already know.

I know infidelity ruins relationships, and I'm probably a horrible person for saying this, but I really hope to see, "_____ just checked in at Uptown Hilton - Feeling: Horny" on Facebook someday.

:D

I chose to watch the Patriots win over watching Girls because it would be less predictable. Mmmhmm.

Not twerking at all. Though I do admire her determination to twerk wherever, whenever.

SO this was my 2013 calendar and I haven't been find a calendar since that's been as cool. Sad face.

Bobby Burns. That Scottish accent OY.

Best feeling ever when toothpaste is running out and you can be like BUT WAIT, I HAVE ANOTHER

This woman is THE BOMB.

That is such a good idea!! And I want to go to Chanelston. It sounds like a place where everyone is exceptionally well-dressed.

It's not peenvee, but I totally gave a guy a blowjob after knowing better. At the bar, we were touching each other's hands. I remarked how soft they were. He leaned in close and said, "You know how I do it?" I asked how. He told me it was because he masturbated a lot. And splooged into his hands. His splooge was his…

Right, you can. And that's a good idea, sort of like a virtual address book. I just like to complain. :)

It's awful. And it's even worse if you've had multiple addresses in one city. At a glance you think it's going to be delivered to your new digs but NOPE.

They are the WORST. I have no idea why but Amazon kept resetting my 'automatic' address as a place I lived over two years ago. I would change the setting and delete the address, but it would keep shipping there. There were a couple of instances in which I didn't figure it out in time and whoever lived there got my…

THIS IS BANANAS. Why do people do this again?