Haitians are black. They descend from the same African population that African Americans descend from.

>>>”Person B: “Well the kid is actually Haitian, not that it matters.””

That baby is black, blackity, black. That kids mother is in store for a rude awakening. Haitian and Puerto Rican fool he black.

Times is hard for Katherine Heigl

It’s just a lovely blue dress.

Let’s look back at how this journey began...

Why in the world do they suddenly care about women being assaulted. No one seemed to care when it was a drunk guy trying to grope me in the middle of the street or on the subway or at a concert.

OH WAIT, ITS not about that is it

the best thing about this job is getting to work at least the first hour or so from home in sweatpants w dog

me trying to choose between carnitas or barbacoa

Okaaaay, but why? Like, I’m glad that this author is a well-adjusted person with happy memories of her childhood and adolescence, but I don’t really see how that contributes to the conversation.

Okay, that’s kind of a relief.

“And really I’m not saying he’s evil or a monster. In fact I don’t think Hitler was.”

It’s them!

This is like, a thing? People do this regularly enough that it's an actual criminal justice specialty? I never heard of anybody doing this, let alone many people.

I know we’re not supposed to even entertain this point, but what final exams does one give an 8 year old to prove they’re prepared for a career in literally ANYTHING? This kind of hubris is so alarming. I hope this kid gets put in the supervised environment he, and society at large, so desperately needs. My mom…

Martin Short is obnoxious. Oh, you can do a funny voice? Hi LAR i ous!

NEVER GAZE UPON THE JUMBOTRON

My favorite bit is where “NO FAST MOVEMENTS” is immediately followed by “NO SLOW MOVEMENTS,” which is just so very Goldilocks of him. That and “DO NOT EVER LOOK AT THE JUMBOTRON.”

I'm reading it like a Kanye rap.