I’m not up on my Alabama state law, but I’m guessing “irrepressible douchebag” isn’t a protected class.

And who do I have to bribe to get some more Mary Carillo up in the house? She’s seriously one of the best they have, but because she doesn’t “fit the mold” of what they think a female sportscaster should be, she gets shoved in the corner. It pains me every two years when the Olympics roll around and Bob Costas is all…

Lane Kiffin and Jimmy Fallon should collaborate on a series of courses on how to fail upward.

Favorite graffiti from the USC days:

Usually unwise to pick up so many discarded Trojans.

As a parting gift Alabama sent Kiffin a bus to his home but it kept pulling away a little bit as he approached the door.

“Big deal Alabama. I beat you to it by 10 months.”

And yet somehow, in terms of career humiliations, this barely ranks in Kiffin’s top five.

Who would’ve ever thought that Mark Davis would turn out to be the Bay Area’s most competent NFL owner?

They suckered someone into building them a stadium, what do they care about winning now that it’s built?

I don’t see anything wrong with that.

It’s staggering to think what Rodgers might have accomplished by now if Mike McCarthy hadn’t been the coach for his entire career.

“oh hey everyone look at me! not only do i have a wife, like some kinda big shot, but people also invite me to their parties! AND i have a job! look how great MY life is!” so sick of your humblebragging.

I never said it was my Malibu.

It’s especially dumb coming from a man who has earned a fortune coaching at public institutions. I am fully down with lowering his tax rate if we lower his salary to something sensible and pay his labor force something more respectable than with a sham of a college education—that’s not even guaranteed.

Lane Kiffin is privilege personified.

Leave me once, shame on you.

“I used to say there’s a constantly daily battle between who can take more of my money between Layla and Obama.”

This just in: his ass got left AGAIN. God bless whomever orchestrated this at Alabama.

Those ‘jokes’ are terrible even by racist-uncle-forwarded-email standards.