I think I saw my first alligator today after living in Florida for two years. Holy shit. I didn’t have my glasses on, so it could have been a fucking monstrous iguana, but my gut says gator.

Woohoo!! Congrats!!

Nutty Professor, although I can absolutely be a Hemingway when its called for. Hell, I went to a yoga teacher’s meeting drunk from lunch once. I nailed it.

I too am a non-mint loving monster...

Soooo if I just pour tequila into my stumptown cold brew, throw in some heavy cream, and pop a donut hole in my mouth can we call it a day?

I would omit the mint and it sounds fantastic. Maybe even sub the mint for something on the chocolate spectrum? Similar to a caffe patron taste? Oh helllllll yes

You mean, that’s not how you’re supposed to contour? Shit.

Sooo what is the rate of divorce of a couple where one partner is over 32 and one is under 32? Fucking math.

#penis is still allowed and I got banned because I posted my partial mastectomy photo from the SCAR Project? Screw you instagram.

that is hands down the best part

I couldn’t even get through episode two. So unfortunate.

My face at least once every BCO post. Thank you pee cup kid.

LOL my parents told me the tooth fairy only carries coins because she likes the way they jingle!

Animals are the greatest things ever. My pup helped me get through my awful bedrest during pregnancy. This was her as a puppy

I find myself feeling this way now as a mom as well. During the day I often am thinking about that glass of wine I’ll have after he’s asleep. Its not that I am drinking too much, but its in my thoughts a lot. Sending you some love and good vibes. If you think you might need some help get it now before it starts to get…

#drunkproblems

Holy shit. I just found out I’ve lost 60lbs in the 6 months since I gave birth. I guess I’m proud of myself? Also a little worried that I’ll look underweight soon... Any advice for maintaining weight while breastfeeding?

ALWAYS SQUARE PIZZA. I saw a fist fight in a Brooklyn slice shop because someone else got the last square slice piece even though apparently the other guy had asked for it first. LOL Bay Ridge FTW

I can’t remember, possibly?

Depending on when you’re there in November, go to the Plaza, have a cocktail in the Champagne Bar (yes overpriced, but atmosphere and if you make friends with the waitstaff I PROMISE YOU it will be well worth it), then walk next door and check out the holiday windows at Bergdorfs, then are truly magical.