I have to watch the scenes he didn't show? I can do that at home.

Is he related to Michelle? Either way , make a Buffy joke.

Half the review and most of the comments are about JJ Abrams. Which seems odd as he didn't write or direct this.

Seeing as how Abrams didn't write or direct this you should be fine.

Wait. She's bullied and they pin it on her? Not cool

Good lord. Is there no wiggle room for common sense? How old is Monitor Jr?

Yes, I was checking my sarcasm detector at that point

*golf clap*

Is there much you can write about there not being a rapture? I'd struggle to get more than a few pages out of that.Maybe you could do a book where each chapter was like that.
Chapter 1- There's not going to be a rapture.
Chapter 2- Bigfoot isn't real.
Chapter 3 - No ghosts either. Sorry.

It's a different kind of terrible altogether.

"Voice activated, real time strategy pinball game" Great, now I have to find this.

Of the many confusing things about the synopsis, my main one is, given this universe is one where god is empirically proven to exist, why are the people worried about dying?
"Heaven exists!"
"Never mind that, help me land this plane!"
"Why?"
"Because otherwise we'll die and go to heave…..oh, right."

If there's money in it then there's greed and deceit to follow.

Bullshit. All the papers supported them. Even the Express. The Daily Mail was the only paper where the editor personally knew Stephen Lawrence's father. It's debatable whether that was the deciding factor in Paul Dacre doing the right thing.

#saynotohashtags

You mean you didn't welcome our new Univision overlords?

I have and …..I'm drawing a blank.

I'm charitably going to assume she was doing it in a "can you believe this shit they're writing?" Way.

Was she?

Another reason to rue not being able to afford Primavera.