ellen-degenerate
Ellen Degenerate
ellen-degenerate

I live in the Southwest Suburbs. Can confirm.

Man you got me all excited about being able to finally go pro :(

As an amateur tall blonde lady, how do I become a professional? I like money too! Where is my license?

Wow, how does anyone think Obama was out there intentionally gunning for their job like he wasn’t busy trying to run a country (no offense to your dad, I’m just speaking in general confusion)? I’m sorry your dad lost his job, but I guarantee Obama wasn’t sitting there going “Who should I fire? IHateGoatsPartDeux’s

Your dad is a real live “THANKS OBAMA” person? My mom won’t even watch Obama speak on TV without changing the channel because she hates him so much. I’ll never understand how this has turned everyone so stupid. I’m sure my parents are so confused how they ended up with a liberal, socialist, feminist for a daughter.

God these fucking Republicans. I also suffer from Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, so Kati’s response hits particularly close to me. I’m lucky enough to be insured through my job, but I realize if I ever need to get private insurance I’m fucked without Obamacare. Why do they hate everything? The worst part is my own

My ex’s brothers used to come up with nicknames for the women he dated, most of which they wouldn’t say to the woman’s face because they were not so kind. The beast, one of his exes, comes to mind. Mine was Lew (for those who don’t know, after Lew Alcindor, KAJ’s birth name) because I’m kind of tall. It never bothered

You and I both. I saw this and was immediately thinking “how quickly can we make this happen?” Team Canada!

This will never be not funny to me. Sometimes when I’m really down I’ll just watch that video to make myself feel better. Bless her heart.

You have no idea. Especially since I’m currently living back at home after moving back to IL from out of state. Also, I finally just told them about a year and a half ago (long before all the Trump horror stories came out) that I was raped as a teenager. I went through a lot of issues after this including cutting and

I live in the south burbs as well. You’re not wrong. My own parents are Trump supporters.

This is absolutely true. I grew up in the suburbs and live and work here again after an 8 year hiatus in NC. My brother still lives in NC, and we were roommates for a while. My cat nephews (who I helped raise) are named Jake and Elwood. Every time my brother and I would road trip together back home one of us would

I don’t know if I’m more angry about pulling Hendricks or more excited about Grandpa Rossy’s dinger. I’m such a conflicted mess of emotions. But seriously why did he pull Hendricks? I need answers.

Thank God for relatives who are accountants. My uncle takes care of pretty much everyone in our family. Your statement is very accurate though; I know a lot of people that do their own taxes.

This is literally exactly what I said a little louder than I intended on the train when I just read this headline. Whoops. But seriously, as a white person, what the fuck is wrong with white people?

I am mesmerized by this GIF. I can't stop looking at it, and I feel like a sick, sick person. That being said, I'm with you. This is gonna be a hell of a year.

As a Cubs fan who lives in/grew up on the south side I feel you. Let’s just swap places.

Hey don’t be hating on the Ellen Degenerates out there! I was a kid when she came out, and I can’t tell you how many times I got called Ellen Degeneres (even though my first name is spelled differently). So jokingly as an adult I began calling myself Ellen Degenerate. It suits me though. It’s shitty people called her

I had an ovarian teratoma that caused my ovary to twist and ultimately led to the loss of one of my ovaries. The silver lining of this was that my teratoma was free of hair, teeth, and other weird features. It would have been a million times worse to find out that not only did I lose my ovary but my tumor had hair or

He should have used his scientology given super powers and ability to move things with his mind and made the cookie dough find him. Duh. That's the obvious answer.