Remember when Rub & Tug was a movie which could actually get financed and made when there was a star actress associated with it?

k

Don’t text, ‘OK’, but do text ‘Sure thing’.

I’ll leave this here:

I’ve found that the trick to getting this is to look at the menu in advance online be ready to order an appetizer right when you sit down and ask if they could put that in while “we have a few more minutes to look over the entrees” (of course, if you’re like me at all, you already picked out your entree - or at least…

I just bang away at the keyboard so they see me typing and then just delete without ever responding. 

God, I have missed Joe Pesci so much.

Would you greet it with a saucer of your delicious milk?

*feature not a bug

I saw a reddit AITA a bit ago where a dad was asking if he was a jerk for not using separate, dedicated cookware (regardless of how clean it was) for the food for his suddenly-vegan teenage daughter.

It could be 100% pork and 0% beef. If that’s vegan than I’ll reconsider my opinion of vegan.

Alexa, show me why people hate vegans.

Winter Soldier definitely deserves a spot on this list

Please find me one good character in the entire film.

This particular story about the Joker is a neat reminder about how many people really wanted to hate the Joker and were really disappointed not everyone felt the same way.

Then I’m going over to Le Monde to see what the French press has to say.

Thanks for this. This issue has been keeping me up at night. 

Fuck that. I’m still celebrating my birthday in my 30's.

You wanna know why?
1) For 13 years of my life, my birthday consisted of “It’s your birthday.  Whoo.  Now get back to studying for finals”
2) Because I fucking want to.

It’s not for the birthday-haver, it’s for their friends and family, who enjoy embarrassing their loved ones.  It’s why I have no friends.

They’d probably prefer a 4x3.