He looks like an Entourage extra.

I’d be interested to hear what specifically you find distasteful about the liberal political philosophy.

Hey, everyone, we can start the party. Mr. False Equivalency is here!

Was he in your punctuation class?

This is a huge disservice to Giannis. He can actually, you know, play and stuff. Shaq didn’t have a single identifiable basketball skill. He was bigger and stronger than everyone and steadfastly refused to improve his game. Giannis is improving season by season and seemingly game by game. Shaq left the game as the…

If he would only listen to the council of his inner circle. Frederick Douglass. His imaginary friend Joe who doesn’t go to Paris anymore. Covfefe.

It’s almost as if he doesn’t understand how the federal government works. But that can’t be true. Putin is too smart to have installed someone that bone dumb!

Pence is a dirty as the rest of them. I just assume that the entire cabinet and members of the reich wing media on Capitol Hill are on the Putin payroll. Rohrabacher and Nunes don’t even pretend otherwise. Same with Comrade Hannity.

That thing my son admitted happened never happened. By the way, what does collusion mean? Is it the same as covfefe?

He’s the drunken uncle who shows up late to Thanksgiving dinner and stares at your teenage girlfriend’s tits all night.

I’m encouraged by Trump’s righteous outrage at what is, make no mistake, an act of war, an attempt by a hostile foreign power to undo our system of government. At least I assume that’s his response. Sorry, I’ve been in a coma for nine months. Is America great again?

The uranium story is not a story, and those of us with two brain cells to rub together know this. In the minds of the bipedal mammals who follow Trump, though, she personally delivered the uranium to terrorists and installed it in the bombs, then took the billions of dollars she made off the deal and... I can’t keep…

Donny Two Scoops and the bipedal mammals who follow him are saying Clinton is guilty of collusion and the DISHONEST MEDIA is dutifully regurgitating his word soup without comment. The lead story should be:

“In tonight’s edition of ‘Things Donald Trump Doesn’t Understand’, we talk about ‘collusion’, which his nitwit…

She’s a woman. She’s asking for it. They’re all asking for it, amirite? (I’m dresssing up as “scumbag apologist” for Halloween and practicing my schtick.)

David S. Pumpkins makes more sense than Donald J. Trumpkins.

Some first class parenting going on in that household. God, that poor kid.

I don’t see DeVos, but I do see a photo of two scarecrows.

Oh, so that’s what one of those is supposed to look like!

An after-the-fact thank you.

It sounds like your baby was radicalized in the womb. Did the doctor have brown skin and a funny-sounding name or accent? You should contact ICE immediately.