In a just world, the players professors would simply get paid for their labor up front

The goal should be improving the health care system, though, and not throwing bones to the wingnuts just to shut them up.

I think you need to have a meeting with your colleagues at Deadspin. Every day they remind us that being a student athlete is a life of misery and toil, and that athletes should be paid. You’re suggesting the ... teachers should be paid?,

Because he will always, always be on TV.

Only REAL MURCANS.

“Dafuq?”
— citizens of Indianapolis tomorrow morning

Because that’s what Jay-suss wants.

Yeah, the nonstop torrent of outrages numbs the brain. Every day there are a dozen incidents which should drag down the administration for months. As has been noted, three years ago the media was in a frenzy because Obama wore a tan suit.

I’ll make it easy on you. Everyone in the cabinet is on the Putin payroll, as is…

Heh. And they thought he retired. The defining Ray Lewis sentence was written on this very website by the sage Drew Magary:

“Ray Lewis’s success is proof that God loves all of you. And by “God,” I mean Ray Lewis. And by “all of you,” I mean Ray Lewis, too.” 

This is how wingnuts imagine Hillary Clinton.

The Kushner-to-human transition process takes years, and, as we can see, is rarely successful.

I wouldn’t be surprised to see him coaching another team next year.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
— John Calipari

“Great move!”
— every Western Conference power forward

Seriously, imagine Melo “guarding” Anthony Davis, or Blake Griffin, or...

When asked for his opinion on the state of government in America, Holtz said he thinkth King George ith doing a thuper job.

“I know, right? He sounds like he’s from Nambia!”

But he believes it’s true, which is all that matters in our truthy world.

Who knows. Maybe never. Maybe every day. Clearly the brain cells responsible for retaining those memories died a painful whiskey drowning death back when football players wore leather helmets.

MURCAN PATRIOTS, that’s who. Frickin’ libtard...

“Grandpa Lou, why have you been staring at the microwave all day?”