Oof, that sounds SO frustrating! My parents will be sort of lost in different ways if they have to stop relying on one or the other, but not that lost!

Sounds like maybe the SAHing was more a function of her personality/control impulses than anything else!

<3

Don’t worry—lots of kids turn out great with full-time working moms, but I get it: when you have a happy childhood/adolescence, you want to replicate that for your own kids. <3

So the answer is basically lose-lose (?)

Yeah, that doesn’t sound great at all. Both my parents worked long hours, but we could tag along (which we hated), and we weren’t away from them a bunch.

I think it MUST make a huge difference if their parenting style allows the kid to have space! Goodness knows my mom would have liked to be a stay-at-home mom, but we all treasured our space, poor thing, and we liked being un-attended!

Thanks for sharing! I only have a couple of friends who had stay-at-home moms (so my sample size is not big at all!) and one had a LOT of siblings, so she had her independence, but the other friend has a much more troubled relationship re: a codependent mom. But I know a lot more people currently stay-at-homing and I…

I’m not going to back seat parent or amateur psychologize since I don’t have children based off of my anecdotal observations but...

I would like to hear from the adult children of full-time parents. Was that a good thing for you? Was it bad? Was it neutral? Do you feel like you’d be the same person if you hadn’t had a stay-at-home mom/dad?

Yeah it’s such a circus. I feel like they pretty much stopped reading the comments section after their coverage of the election was criticized so constantly and incisively by their own loyal readers for two years.

MISS YOU get unbanned soon! <3

They just duck down into the comments once in a while. Original Jez used to cultivate a relationship with the commenters, but those days have long since passed. They’re not engaged enough to know CCCFB’s commenting style offhand. That said, a cursory glance at her comment history would confirm she’s not a troll. They…

I do understand why you second-guessed it but I support the public blast of cheaters (always when they are childless, on a case-by-case basis when kids are in the picture).

I just want to chime in to offer my sympathy for chocolate chips, who is one of my favorite commenters on here, and put out a reminder that I was also banned on my beloved burner ElephantShoe2 and despite emailing Jez and receiving responses once and getting unbanned etc. I was in the grays and re-banned the following…

What was and still is in my radar is how much less leniency women get before people start regarding us as dumbasses.

They do, especially as I am a teaching assistant, not a prof, but they have sent them to the young female faculty I have taught for, as well. Students often back down when I offer to pass the dispute along to their male professors, though. When it does go up the chain, it’s always shot down after the professors look…

I think that is the very Nature of the Troll, nay?

That’s well said. And some “good” guys will tell women that the vocal ones are assholes once they’ve left the room, but how often do they tell the vocal guys point blank that their biases are wrong?

Well, per departmental policy, I rarely give out solid As, and last semester I gave out more to men than to women, so no (memory is iffy but it was probably 3 or 4 As to men and 2 to women). Obviously, there were a lot of men in the A and A- range whose confidence in themselves was totally earned, and there are a lot…