Thank you for mentioning Mr. Taylor.

Awww :(

For real, if that came into my house? Well, it wouldn't be my house anymore. That house belongs to the spider.

Jesus christ, Eisen!

"Read what I wrote let me elaborate. Christians are taking Christian and Jewish laws like rules about abortion and gay marriage and using those to supplant laws of the land."

Spoken like a girl whose concept of history begins a decade ago (at most). The laws you decry were the norm in the USA.

You random, cliche…

It's a totally natural cure for constipation! But it will give the runs....as in, runs away!!! AAaaAagh!

WHY HAVE YOU DONE THIS?!?!

:LKSJDV:LNISD:LKNLIJSDF

No. No no no no no. Please tell me that is not real.

It wasn't even Double Dragon.

I swear the whole thing reads like something McCarthy would've written into one of his early novels— right down to the dialogue. (Except that she used punctuation. xD)

The correct answer is you let your jaw drop, and stare at her in wordless shock and awe, as if you have just discovered your new deity.

"Cool dad" is a term used when a grown-up person wants to fit in with his kids' friends. Like Amy Poehler's character in Mean Girls. Here's a gif you've probably seen before in this site.

And here's my dad, everyone.

Lingerie clad or not, a party of 150-200 teenagers sounds completely insufferable.

i agree with what you've said, but abhor the paragraph in which you said it.

My mother, who is seventy-six, said about the photos, "Ick. Don't let her sit on the furniture."

Small detail - There isn't anything in "Jewish Law" about abortion. Jewish tradition teaches that a baby is "alive" when draws it's first breath.

Wait. How the hell did you bring the Jewish people in America into this blame fest? This is the most liberal voting block in the US.