Legally Bland

His burn at the end was great too.

His Christmas card this year is literally just going to be a screen shot of that paragraph.

Nothing in our article has had the slightest effect on the reputation that Mr. Trump, through his own words and actions, has already created for himself.

im positive there are ndas in all his prenups...that’s why ivana and marla have been so quiet. you know they have fucking DIRT on him.

All of this.

(eta- omg- sorry this is so huge!)

He didn’t do opposition research on himself because a) he has no idea how to run a political campaign and b) I still maintain he never had any intention to go the distance with the whole running for president thing, it’s just that his legend of himself doesn’t include quitting or dropping out, so all along the plan…

I think they waited because a supporter told me “Everyone will forget about this in a few weeks” when talking about the pussygate video. If it happened months ago, he would have a chance to redeem himself. Since it just came out, he doesn’t have that chance.

It’s the only podcast I gave a negative review to in iTunes. I could only listen to the podcasts that had a guest on. Because then he tone down the mean shtick. Looks like it wasn’t shtick. He just knew he had to behave in front of others.

I’m not convinced he hasn’t raped anyone.

Who is watching live coverage of this?? Jerry Falwell Jr was just in CNN defending Trump and it looked like Erin Burnett was gonna have a stroke. I am literally shoving buckets of popcorn in my mouth watching this shit unfold.

Or, just play it safe every time. Always say “thanks for calling, I’m going to hang up and call right back to ensure I’m talking to the right people”. If it’s really your credit card company, they won’t be insulted and they’ll thank you for taking the extra step to protect your account. If it’s a scammer, they’ll try…

Still less bizarre than the “would you have annual sex with a goat” one.

Please love yourself.

Husky and Starch

“especially this dip shit son of a mob lawyer”

Christie would totally want to be Trump’s consigliere. Rudy, I think he’d go for either homeland security or defense. Those two is where he could funnel rich government contracts to his fatcat buddies.

You boys need anything while you’re here? Some reds? Yellows? Just got some purples in from Peru.