@Aesop's Foibles.: He's like the e.e. cummings of narration.

@s_ve: I've heard this language before...its kind of a cool syntax that "bros" use to cat-call you. My favorite was when I was hailed as "Damn, a BIG white girl! That's a REAL big white girl, REAL fine" I think the context of real was my "realness" and not the fact that I was "really big." Although it did actually…

@CapitolaTheMadcap: Have you read "As I lay dying"? book still haunts me so much I usually have to read it once a year just to dispell the ghosts. So, yeah, I know what you mean about Faulkner. Also, I got my hands on Flowers in the Attic at about age 9, and had to be secretive about it since my parents had a vague…

Umm, what the hell? the rags keep trying to portray drama in Kendra/Hanks' relationship based on some wierd middle-class prude standard of what *might* go on if both were middle-class prudes and one or the other a) had sex tape or b) visited a strip club. Kendra was a stripper, Kendra had group sex with Hef when he…

@mcpumpkin: Tracy Morgan??

Unfortunately, I tend to date somewhat alcoholic, self-destructive men, so usually whatever they do to themselves when I break up with them is worse than whatever I would do to them....ahh, love is a many splendored thing! OH, btw, I'm single. wink* wink*

On the bright side, if you get kicked out of Iran, you should head straight to Pittsburgh—where the zoo is giving discounts to be-mulletted animal lovers. It was an earlier post on Jezebel, I could link to it, but its too damn hot.

@Caenct: I was in a bar restroom the other day (I was not yet drunk, mind you) and someone had written "Michelle (last name redacted) sucks dick for cake" At least thats what I thought for long time until I figured out someone was probably trying to indicate Michelle is a *coke* whore, not a *cake* whore. I think the…

Somewhat funny anecdote here—seems apropos on this post to share it. I was dating a lovely fellow who happened to be blind and had been so since childhood. He was extremely functional, and good at getting dressed decently either by having a nice, non-offensive button down or a t-shirt with raised lettering so he…

@Aidan_ Is: The Electric Napoleon: I've stuck with signing off with "Best" for a long time, I think it sounds at once more breezy yet more affectionate than "sincerely"

This post is apropos...I've been thinking about this a lot lately since I recently dated someone who was far more eager to say the L-word than I was. I've been pondering this poem by Margaret Atwood and wanted to share part of it—its called "Variations on the word love" and here's a portion which I "lurve":

She's f-in adorable, which, aside from all dem logic and legal jurisprudence skills, is a quality that will be much needed on SCOTUS now that Stevens and O'connor are gone.

@PICKLES_IN_MY_TUNA: I know, I didn't want to body snark, but they make her look like she has cankles. And I know she doesn't

She should take off time and go to college. I think thats the big mistake most child actors make. Because I can't imagine being able to "find" myself and make the transition into adulthood any other way. And I don't mean the partying type college experience, I mean hole up in the library and flirt with your…

Proof that those pants don't look good on anyone. Period.

I've heard that the definition of chutzpah is a kid who kills both his parents and then begs for mercy because he's an orphan. I really wish Angelina would adopt that kid. Because then the tabloids would have something interesting to report on.

@caffeinequeen: wtf! i had never heard of this before and i went to the website and have never been more freakedout. plus then my internet went on the fritz which really freaked me out. why did you post this??? plz post a picture of kittenz now!!

My dad bought this mannequin from a store that was going out of business that looked exactly like my 7 year old self. At the time I think I was 16 or so. Even creepier was perhaps that he did not buy the doll as a gift for me, but mainly because he liked it. Especially creepy is that I have always suspected my dad…

I don't get the Anna Wintour blurb. How is it a class thing to "deign to take the elevator"??

#16 reminds me of the time I got my first bikini—a pink and orange ruffly number from Kmart at approximately age 7. I still have nostalgia for Kmart cause of that, though generally I don't like Kmart. It also reminds me of when I taught ballet and had my 3 year old girls do the most darling "under the sea" dance…