Ben Simmons better upload video of him smoking out of a gas mask if he wants to get paid.

“If you think that is bad just wait until your second year in the league.”

Bob Marley and Me

Maan, guys who are big enough to apologize and willing to completely give up their hobby/income because they realize they were being shitheads for no good reasons are exactly the kind of people who should NOT be leaving the scene.
(ETA except for the people who apparently threatened her with violence. They can stay…

“You’re making the biggest mistake of my career.”- Pat Riley

x=4

BEST.

Adam LaRoche would like to have a word with you.

Shit. We know what happened the last time Mohammed was fed up with the jets.

Haters gonna say it’s fake.

“Oh, yeah. Oooh, ahhh, that’s how it always starts. Then later there’s running and screaming.”

You think that is hard. Imagine the difficulty I had typing this very sentence.

So Ben Roethlisberger didn’t explicitly say no, and Donald Trump took that as a yes? Interesting…

I think that Chump has it in his head that a celebrity has endorsed him if they haven’t specifically wished him dead.

“The Washington Redskins are on indefinite hiatus until they change the name of the team.”

The Yard Goats played home games at Dodd Stadium in Norwich

Not as convincing as when he deked Mets fans into thinking he was going to catch that ground ball in Game 4.

A kid with abusive parents is brought before the Cook County judge to be placed in foster care. The judge asks if he’d like to live with his grandparents. Kid says “they beat me.” Same deal with his other set of grandparents, his aunts and uncles, his older siblings, his neighbors. The judge, exasperated, asks the kid…

[takes a shot]

In the annals of old-timey media scandals, where would 'Johnny Carson Shoots and Kills Frank Gifford For Having an Affair With His Wife' have ranked? Biggest of its era? Biggest of all time?