For my 26th birthday, I was on vacation with my boyfriend on the Big Island of Hawaii. We were staying on the Kona side with his brother who had a job at a company growing algae for biofuels or cosmetics or something.

You be your own grandpa and have your own birthday and we’ll buy you all the cake in the world.

I sat on the sofa under a comfy blanket watching movies and eating pizza with my dog.

I read that as badger and was like THIS IS NOT BORING.

As I was getting into my car this morning to drive to work, I realized I’d left my purse inside. So, I had to go back in the house to get it. 

I plan on being one of those nomads who memorizes books from Fahrenheit 451.  

CGYFY.

One is a poorly structured horror story that nobody wants to live through in real life.

God, the history textbooks 60 years from now are going to be so weird.

They made a right choice

Skipping work + online raging about your old job ≠ book deal

I'd cheerfully sex any of the above versions of that person.

That's a picture of Harrison Ford, playing the iconic role of Han Solo, from the motion picture "The Empire Strikes Back". In this scene, Han is about to be encased in carbonite. He's saying 'I know', which indicates that he does, indeed, know.

My research has shown similar results.

TRUTH.

lanky dudes always bust out the undercover big dick.

Maybe he just has a huge dick? My experience with scrawny nerds is that most of them are packing serious cocks. It does look suspiciously smooth though so idk

Just more evidence you should never count out the dorky-looking guys. Dayum.

I've been holding on to this gif for a long time, not sure where I could put it. Now I know. I'll just leave this right here.