WTF calls the cops over 6 fucking apples? White people love themselves some police violence.

A local municipal judge in my area implemented an optional text messaging service for folks with court dates. A few days before your hearing, you get a reminder text message that your appearance is required.

Those that know, do. Those that understand, teach.

Excellent piece. I’m not a professional editor (although I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express once), but please allow me one piece of editorial advice:

Not even fair enough to go for Dukes...