Listen up, America - this statement:

*quietly* Gordon Ramsay is Scottish and probably was perfectly happy to see England lose... 

What a devastating story.

How about adding a bit at the bottom with info for the suicide lifeline?

way to ruin Magary’s vacation by posting Gary Anderson not missing

Meh.

1-800-273-TALK

Amy’s playing loose and fast with using the word atrocity on a Serbian.

A half-baked theory: As Djokovic has matured, his interests have shifted more and more to politics and the wellbeing of his home country, and that winning tennis tournaments and being ranked number one in the world now seem trivial to him.

“Looks like the shooter’s bullets missed the intended target. If that’s the case, why are there criminal charges?” -Pete Abraham, probably

I spent my entire weekend calling in rules violations to the LPGA, so it was nice being able to take this game off. Good job refs.

I’m partial to the San Diego Bad Hombres. Some, I assume, are good players.

No, they can’t “hand out” guns at Arkansas games. Some black folks attend those games. Also, socialisms.

But I thought more guns = more safety. And an armed society is a polite society. And I also thought that alcohol sales were banned in SEC stadiums. And also, Hitler disarmed the Germans when he took over (not really, but I read it somewhere). Why can’t I bring my arsenal in to cheer on the Hogs?1Q?! How else are the…

Today’s Headline:

Can’t wait for Mark Wahlberg to play Edelman in the movie version. The ball will be voiced by Seth MacFarlane.

“When I told Bill about all the women I slept with on a boat before, I didn’t think I needed to be more specific.”

Pretty wild that Stormfront can’t find a single fucking grammar nazi.