Oh hold on, cgi dwarf Bob Hoskins and cgi dwarf Nick Frost etc just turned up.

I'm about an hour into this and it's not so terrible.

I'm about an hour into this and it's not so terrible.

I live approx 1500km away from my dad's house.

MTV is the only channel that could do a Ben Affleck Daredevil TV Series justice!

I like how Discus' anti-pyramid quite system creates a sort of backward comment min-thread effect.

De Niro reminds me a bit of my dad nowadays. He keeps doing things which make me sadly shake my head and think (or say) 'no no, don't do that, just quietly enjoy your retirement'.

Is Dwayne Johnson the Rock?

They should all be spanked!!!

Boy, wasn't that Ben Affleck Daredevil movie terrible?

Man up and tell her to gtfo dude. 'Verbally destructive'? She sounds like a tool.

Can you watch loads of filthy porn on it so that the next time her kid wants to watch Teatime with Timmy the Turtle, he gets recommendations of Donkey Fisters 4: Backdoor Hee-Haw and Fuck It Like It's Still Alive?

What's so bad about the Hangover Part Two? It was basically more of the first one. Which was a funny comedy movie.

Where's the Pain and Gain review, then?

Who the fuck is Amanda Palmer?

I'm surprised anyone is surprised. People are cretins. Cretins spawned by morons mating with idiots, raised by the brainless to aspire to ignorance.

Enjoying this form of entertainment baffles me.

Breaking news is basically nust entertainment. 'There's been a bombing in Boston', I heard, so switched on the news, saw in 5 minutes what was known at that time, which was basically 'there's been a bombing in Boston', then switched it off and ignored the news for 2 days, by which there was something else to report.

It's actually called 'Been a long long time', I just checked. It's great. There's an awesome bit where he describes the passing of time, and it's like a really really really long time. Long enough for the slow expansion of the universe and then its contraction to the big crunch and repetition of the big…

Years ago, in my misspent youth, I was at a friend's house during a fairly wild party, and after some mushroom tea had kicked in strongly, an acquaintance said to the host 'Hey dude, I think Eco's ready for the monkey story'. I was taken to a room, sat at a desk, a book was opened in front of me, and I was told to…