Can I trade penis size for more sports cars?

Can they do a study on small dicks and bro trucks next? 

Super proud of my small penis and my very practical 4 door sedan

Kenan Thompson’s Bowser was a highlight, he doesn’t say anything and just stares menacingly at the camera to sell the bad guy look.

They forgot to include Luigi’s death stare.

I used to work at a Subway.  There’s no time for this shit.  

Just FYI, it’s not a laugh track, the studio audience at SNL can see this sketch as it’s happening on monitors and react accordingly

Not like it was a tough challenge but it looks like we have yet ANOTHER better choice for Mario than Chris Pratt!

It’s the production values that killed me (in a good way), because....

There’s a lot of things that many developers just can’t ‘grok’ about gaming. This is just one example. Another is modding. The Elderscrolls series is proof that *IF* you design your developer tools around providing access to them to your customers, the time and manpower spent on those refining those tools pays for…

Jewish space lasers?

Now I’m thinking of that gross scene in The Wrestler where Randy the Ram quits the job by jamming his finger into it out of defiance.

I envy those of you who live in a place where ordering sandwiches anyplace other than Subway is an actual option. 

This. Every time I’ve been to Jersey Mike’s, they’ve had somebody just manning the slicer. At Subway, they’ll just have the “sandwich artists” do it. Also, I’m not sure I trust the average Subway 2 person crew to make sandwiches, man the register, AND keep the store and slicer clean.

Or pay them more for more duties.

Five bucks says they don’t even make it through the first weekend before serving up a slice of an employee’s hand.

And let me guess, Subway corporate is going to force heir franchisees to buy new equipment and train employees all the while threatening to take their franchises if they don’t comply.

I don’t know what the correct way to cleaner a slicer is but I do know that OSHA would not have approved of the way 16 year old me was taught to clean one years ago.

I’m waiting for The Takeout’s article about the strawberry scene w/ a strawberry tart recipe included.