I love that Abbi is still wearing the dress she bought for the party last season. This is why I can always get down with Broad City. I see myself up there. Girls, not so much.

WILD STUFF

Those aren't pool noodles, it's pipe insulation. It comes pre slit and has adhesive to stick it to the table.

I really need everyone to be clear on this. If you throw out some lame-ass insult and then include a crying emoji, that doesn't make it shade. You will look dumb. Do not try that at home.

I'm getting a definite Annette Castellano vibe from that mother-in-law.

My mother-in-law consistently addresses letters to my husband and me as Mr. And Mrs. TheirLastName. Even though my husband and I have both made it very clear to her that I have kept my maiden name.

True story: I was once catcalled by a toddler, so every once in a while they are actually flirting.

GROSSSSSS. I hate when parents call their son a "Ladies man" and shit like that. He is not a ladies man, he is a fucking baby and stop trying to make people think of your baby romantically you fucking weirdos. Or even worse when people say their baby is "flirting with you." Ummm no he's not, he probably just has to…

SHADE

Moms who get all creepy possessive over their sons is just fucking weird and strikes me as some reverse Oedipus complex where the Mom isn't getting enough romantic attention from the kid's father/her husband/or other romantic partner so is trying to get it from her kid. This Mom is like metaphorically pissing all over…

I need an emergency shade ruling!!

I live and work in MN. Today is the first day that's been above zero all week. My winter hat is an AMAZING Hobbes hat that my girlfriend crocheted for me.

As in, it has ears and looks like the top of Hobbes head and I AM HOBBES WHEN I WEAR IT.

"...this time she closed the card with: 'From the woman who loved you first.'"

Oh my god I am STRONGLY IN FAVOR OF THIS MEME. MORE, PLS.

#inbreeding

I posted this earlier but between this story, the woman who had sex with her dad, and the crappy wedding invite parents, I'm just so very happy that my parents are awesome. Or at least aren't crazy.

Perhaps they'll even blame their relationship problems on her.

thank u

I like your username.

I thought this was going to be metaphorical middle finger... but Elizabeth, you did not disappoint :)