She's super expressive.

Dude. V05 and Suave shampoo LITERALLY costs 99 cents. Literally. If you cannot afford to spend 99 cents more often than every 8 months then I...you have much bigger problems here.

Jesus, it's like she is a gif making godsend.

Oddly enough, this is a picture of my crotch:

I saw an episode of some show (probably TLC) a long time ago where a woman refused to buy toilet paper because she thought it was wasteful. She had everyone in her family use cloth washcloths to wipe and then put them in a hamper when they were done. I lost my faith in humanity that day... it was a dark time.

I will personally buy this couple a lifetime supply of dental floss if someone can arrange to have the idea of 'shared dental floss' permanently erased from my memory.

NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE…

They don't use moist buttwipes, they just get their hands wet and work from there.

I wonder if they share the same moist butt wipes?

The "sweating my tits off" weather is doing a perfectly fine job of that at the moment.

God damn it, Katie. I just went on an epic internet search to find other hallways that look like crotches, but there only this one. This is the Hallway That Looks Like a Crotch. Defeated, I leave you with this hallway, which has a shark.

Sure, we could accessorize the hall-crotch using Photoshop, but that would ruin its pure beauty.

I mean, isn't that the only silver lining to being sick? Not giving a shit about how you look? Because I literally can't give a shit, I've shat it all out already.

or <SPECIAL USAGE> to describe a woman who has just purchased a product you are trying to sell

In other words, marketing people really are the evil no-goodniks that we imagine them to be?

I feel my least attractive when I'm sick, sure, but that's also when I don't give a flying turd. I revel in looking like I've been vomited up by a larger mammal.

Oh please. Where is the pubic hair, stretch marks, ingrown hairs, uneven labia - or any labia at all? And there's a thigh gap so big you could walk through it.
Way to promote unrealistic standards of crotch beauty, Jezebel.