As someone who had to navigate the California unemployment benefit process in late 2013, I have no trouble believing that it’s really hard to even get someone on the phone, much less get correct answers from whoever you do end up getting. However, these are your children, dude. Figure it out.

Like, dude, I’m sure a cubicle that will pay you $30K talking on the phone all day is available somewhere. Does the job suck ass? Sure does, but you gotta do what you gotta do. His use of “on the lamb” worries me about his writing skill, anyway. It’s “on the lam.”

found whitlock

Correlation doesn’t necessarily equal causation, but I agree. They operated for years without issues, but once they started sponsoring segments on pregame shows and appearing on every commercial break, the government sure started sniffing around, didn’t they?

+1 deal getting worse all the time

Kenny is altering the deal, pray he doesn’t alter it any further

My least favorite thing about Deadspin right now is the tease of a new Drew article only to see it’s an ad for a podcast I’ll never check out.

What a world we live in where the question “Should Ryan Fitzpatrick be paid like the worst non-dumpster fire starter, or the best backup in the world?” is front-page news in the middle of March.

This is the same reason King Size Snickers are better. More nougat, less chocolate. The seasonal Snickers don’t work, though. Not ENOUGH chocolate. Life is weird.

There are a couple of videos of him being interviewed for an hour by the Des Moines newspapers prior to the Iowa caucuses on YouTube. The amount of “wait... huh?” in those videos is incredible. The reporters don’t even bother pressing him, for the most part, just because he’s either crazy or the ideas are so…

If you look up shoot interviews with Nash from, say, 2010 versus the last couple of years, he seems significantly slower than before. Maybe he had a bad night and was nursing a hangover, maybe he’s been smoking way too much weed, who knows, but there’s definitely a difference. It’s kind of scary.

Yeah, this is SOP at a county fair. That’s what the auction is for.

They didn’t say that, and you know it.

Let’s dispel once and for all with this fiction that Michelle Carter didn’t know what she was doing. She knew EXACTLY what she was doing.

I had a couple of the chili cheese variety on Sunday. They were fine! Not much else to say, really.

Sometimes I think the soccer commentary here is just aping how the UK soccer press seems to be. Whatever happened the previous Saturday is now the unimpeachable truth, and the sky is always, always falling. Just go with the most extreme opinion that could possibly be gleaned from the most recent occurrence. NFL media…

We were told on 2/6 that Leicester City had everything wrapped up and the rest of the year was a mere formality. We were told on 2/15 that Leicester City was screwed and Arsenal winning was inevitable. Now it’s “impossibly close.” You can’t say Deadspin hasn’t covered all the possibilities!

The nutritional info on the volcano items is absolutely horrifying. There’s a reason it tastes so good: it’s pure artery cloggage.

The Quesalupa was just too much like a normal Chalupa at 1.5x the price. I liked it, but not significantly more than the original. The commercials make it look 20x cheesier than it actually is.

Then the column itself is a flawed idea. A Q&A that never actually answers a question is pointless.