The brand was unreported, but must have been PBR, Natty, or Milwaukee’s Best if the gator was actually upset about being forced to drink beer.

Apple butter? I’m sold. I always have a jar in the fridge, usually for biscuits, but I can spare a little for a burger.

“Well said!”

As if the airlines needed a scape goat to charge another $100 to cram you in to cattle class.

Dear fans of opposing teams: STOP LINING DAN SNYDER’S POCKETS. He is a human cancer and every dollar you give him just makes him want to jack off to a picture of himself. It’s like the saying at the end of It’s a Wonderful Life, but different: “Every time a ticket to FedEx field is sold, a demon gets his pitchfork.”

Oh Terry, never leave the broadcasting booth.

What if I told you taking climate change seriously, but still laughing at people who manage to lose control of a firehouse spewing blood red juice is entirely possible?

Even if that were true, that would be such a terrible excuse. You have lived a completely different country for a long time, you are referring to a person who is a native of another country and he’s living in yet another country. You should know better than to fire off whatever local slang you picked up that might be…

It’s the amount of the damage, not the intent. If she had taken a sharpie to the window, it would just be a misdemeanor. But she basically took $2000 out of someone’s pocket (the insurance company, most likely) and shredded it.

I see what you’re saying, but there are still going to be tasks that I don’t see AI replacing them until they reach Data level. Construction requires a lot of hands on coordination. Even if the blueprints are perfect (and they never are), you still run into issues with the materials, tooling, and other factors that…

You want to avoid being unable to access your cash because the “advanced” ATM that shut down your neighborhood branch is out of order and the chatbot on the call to customer service doesn’t understand what you’re saying when you tell it you want to “report a broken ATM”?

Hey Hey Hey, you keep that kind of talk where it belongs, on Jalopnik! “withdraw cash so I could buy a project car”, that doesn’t belong on Gizmodo.

HEY GUYS!

One of these summoned cars is eventually going to hit another car or be hit by another car, and it will likely be because of the erratic nature of the Tesla’s movements.

This is a feature designed for private parking lots. You really can’t outlaw that, unless the owner posts signs not to use the feature in their lot, then they can charge violators with trespassing (the unauthorized use of private property).

The “pain” and “vulnerability” you felt was your own damn fault. I’ve actually heard a pastor* put it the way: Not every struggle is from God, some of it is because you did something stupid. And this is definitely the later case.

Isn’t it obvious? They’re “Baptists” who preach about the evils of homosexuality. They couldn’t call themselves the “flamings” because it would be too much on the nose.

Can someone help explain to this occasional visitor why the hell anyone drives in mid-town Manhattan? It seems every time I’ve been there, it’s just a few cars away from total gridlock. In some spots you can walk faster than traffic, and certainly if you start in like Queens then riding the subway to anywhere in…