Masturbation and chloride in my tap water?

*looks in mirror*

It’s all starting to make sense.

I would even argue that Smackdown on ps1 looks better than 2k20.

I guess we’ll have to take their word for it that Kim Jong Un scored 10 goals, 5 touchdowns, 8 homeruns and 15 wickets.

Don’t shit in the wheat!

What kind of place must you be in your life to not make this kind of connection? Is there some sort of clinical term for this total lack of ability to reflect upon one’s self? Truly amazing.

Copy of Trump’s letter to Erdogan per Trish Regan, FOXBussines.

My grandparents took me to see Aliens at a young age. We thought it was cool. I will say however that the original Alien did freak me out as a very young kid but I got over it by watching more scary movies.

Given how many apps the 64-bit transition has broken, I’m going to hold off as long as humanly possible.

Cutting also increases the surface area and those cut sides caramelize better than the uncut sides, which is what you want.

I had one, and only one thought throughout my first and last massage: “Oh my god, please stop talking about your pet turtles.”

I don’t know of many people who can hit an elk hard enough to kill it and walk away from the accident themselves. Elk are big. Elk do not give a fuck. (Seriously, just go to Estes Park in Colorado).

“my mind went straight to what a peaceful, serene hip-hop playlist would sound like”

If you process it into avocado toast, that thing has a street value of roughly $40,000.

It might make my 3yo chill the fuck out for an hour so.....sure, bring it on!

that shit ain’t free

Why would you waste perfectly good edibles on crappy kids you don’t even know ?

It’s not heroin, it won’t get them “hooked” on anything, you aren’t starting a business doing that. It’s just gonna make them puke and cry. Plus, and this is the important part, it won’t make me happy and high. Why would you want to hurt…

Been cooking brussel sprouts with maple syrup and cubed, thick cut bacon for a long time now. Toss after 10 - 15 minutes to coat the veg with the rendered bacon fat.

This movie has a 91% on Rotten Tomatoes.

Is it as astonishing as the amount of articles bashing it without having seen it?