Ok, I wont try to tell hm anything.

I just wish at least one of them had even a trace of a sense of humor. I mean theyre all filthy rich, drive cool cars and they have sex with every attractive woman in their damn zip code and they cant crack a smile every once in a while? Jesus. Talk about crybabies.

I hope somebody made him drink a whole 12 pack of Bud and reflect on what he had done.

Bond, Batman and Bourne are all the same character now.

Of course she’ll be fine.

“I bring nothing to the table...I’m not work material. I will never be work material.”

Are you insane?

To shed a little perspective he might consider that there are a lot of poor African children who have never even heard of golf and, if presented with a golf club, might simply beat another child to death with it in order to curry with the tribal warlord.

“...Depp had scrawled messages to her on the walls in a combination of oil paint and his own blood, along with urinating “all over the house.”

I just checked out Craigslist in Hell and theres a position open for getting raped by Satan for all eternity.

“Bick, you shoulda shot that fella a long time ago. Now he’s too rich to kill.”

“Donna announces she’s taking over as DJ and plugs in her own phone to play Ariana Grande.”

Maybe you should do a post about how saucy you are.

“So the Pope, Dean Martin and a dead five year old walk into a bar.....”

At first glance I thought this was a story about World War One prostitutes called “The Trench Fuck”.

“How do you spell that??”

“Did he ever fuck his daughter? I mean if she was hot that is? Did he have a Tiffany? If so I wouldnt blame him for staying the hell out of that!”

Yes, from now on they will admit any hobo regardless of race.