Reese Withered-spoon?

Such a good word.

This kid is suffering from a bad case of Backpfeifengesicht 

Eh, I’ll give Bregman a pass for the sheer joy of seeing Tucker Carlson losing his shit.

Emma Thompson is smart, educated, funny and has integrity. More young girls should aspire to be her instead of a damn Kardashian.

But should NOT be in a museum. Maybe in a back room, in drawer 14J, but definitely not on display. 

You mean Reese Witherspoon after being dead for 20 years.

Or maybe a dried apple kitchen witch. Haven’t we all made them? No? Just me, because I’m insane and a sucker for any all holiday decor?

The American people just stood up, as one, and said clearly and with conviction, “We are a bunch of racist assholes and we love Trump!”

Thank you for making me cackle at my desk. 

And she’s squeezed down so tight that she squeaks when she walks.

You know you don’t get laid because of opinions like this, right, you pathetic incel?

That is some excellent mental chess, my man. 

In an era before the internet, a person who genuinely had that train of thought might see where their attitude is alienating people, and if they want to connect with other people they’d have to change that attitude and learn some empathy, or get comfortable being isolated. But in this era, those dudes are able to form…

“It’s actually self-affirming to not have friends” is one way to go through life, I guess.

True Story: if you ever say you're playing chess when you aren't literally playing chess then you are actually just playing Shoots N Ladders because you're a literal asshole. 

“Its mental chess to me. She put an X in the box and I straight up blocked her with an O.”

Im interested in what several anonymous fat people think about her career decisions.

There’d be even more drawings if we could get them to stop eating the crayons.