People who feel the need to tell you how humble they are, repeatedly, are one short rung below the people who use “bless your heart” as an insult on the ladder of casual hypocrisy.

I guess Hatless VI here is shit out of luck.

With the Warriors possibly on the decline, I have no doubt that LA will brow beat the California media to anoint them the new kings of California.

The Bears are going to end up hiring a Kicker whose mutant super power is kicking perfect field goals from exactly 43 yards out...and nowhere else.

Man, I was hoping for a video of him looking around for parents/teachers/nuns, whispering “fuck” and then doing whatever his robot vocal chords process as laughter.

Sounds like some competitive fire. I think that qualifies them for a start in Pittsburgh. 

Instead of focusing on all the negative like the fake news media always does, why aren’t you reporting on the happy and healthy birth of bottles of glue?

Given the way it’s been called, not so surprising. Two one-day suspensions and both were completely uncalled on the ice IIRC. Fighting is a pretty automatic call. Cheap shots, on the other hand, have been relatively uncalled. Seems the better risk/reward option.

Think Barstool had a post with a picture of that exact moment as well. So...how bad you want that screen cap?

I was thinking of just on the ice and in the stadium, but you're right, we should account for city-wide stats as well. Of course, we also have to account for deaths if they win. IIRC, there have been deaths at Boston celebrations.

On the ”karma” front, was I the only one amused that Marchand was called for a nearly identical trip to the one that assisted the Game 5 winner? 

The last couple of minutes made me think that in the playoffs, penalties should carry from game to game to shut down the stupidity of men acting out because they’re angry they didn’t do enough to win the game, but like 90% of that game was good watching.

A player or coach screwing up doesn’t affect the game because not screwing up is a part of the game. People shitting the bed against the Patriots is inherently part of the game. You have to not do that if you want to beat them.

...yes, that’s exactly the implication the sentence you quoted was going for.

...and then everyone stood up and started clapping. 

I guess it's a good thing the Pirates are already nigh- unwatchable?

Any minority who has been accused of reverse racism should remember this: “I watch Friends” is apparently just as good a defense as “one of my best friends is white”.

Enterprise was started by a former sailor, IIRC. It makes quite a bit of sense that they make a lot of money transporting Marines from one place to another.

Please keep up this picture of the Iwo Jima flag raising. It’s only offensive to Marines with boots up their asses, and we don’t care about boot-ass Marines.

Officer, I’m offended that you gave me this ticket for driving 100 miles per hour in a school zone. I’ll have you know I went 16 years without getting a single ticket, so your behavior is clearly wrong.