While the NFL owners are further exposing themselves as myopic halfwits, I regard anything that limits or minimizes my exposure to the NFL as a positive development.

Here’s an idea: people older than 50 are a reliable voting bloc. I know, it’s difficult for some people to imagine that Olds need candidates that they feel like they relate to, but it’s true.

Here’s an idea: people older than 50 are a reliable voting bloc. I know, it’s difficult for some people to imagine that Olds need candidates that they feel like they relate to, but it’s true.

This just proves once and for all what DFS bros have been saying all along: DFS is a game of skill. The primary skill, of course, being identifying obvious, brazen frauds and staying the fuck away from DFS sites.

You’re right. Let’s not get distracted from the main point of your comment--I.e. You publicly exposing your own idiocy.  

Reading Graham’s comments underscores how critical it is for anyone who is contemplating voting for a third party to fill out their ballot early, and shove it directly up their own ass where it can reside next to his or her head.

I never ever say this, but: My God, man. That was a truly inspired internet comment.

Wait. Wha-...huh? Oh, sorry. I kinda lost focus there for a minute. I was having trouble deciding which is the most awesome: the super smart point I was about to make, the sound of my own voice, or the way my dong looked in the mirror this morning. SO TOUGH, I KNOW.

Counterpoint: Sam Bee is right, smart and levelheaded and you’re a pompous blowhard looking for a savior in a pool of office-seekers.

I feel the same way about “Juggaloes.”

I think the clear take away here is that umpires are the only people who make mistakes at their jobs. Furthermore, bad calls are not an inherent risk to competing in a sporting event. Therefore, when an umpire makes a bad call, the correct response is for the offending umpire to be mercilessly pilloried and to make…

For the record: Fuck Steve Jobs. Anyone who obsesses over and maintains an image that tightly controlled is a cult leader and a megalomaniac of the highest order. He didn’t *invent* shit, he couldn’t even write code. He wasn’t in the same universe, intellectually or creatively, as Thomas Edison but he sure knew how to…

One thing to consider apropos Ward, in addition to his immaculate record since age 12:

Having read this article, I now think that the best thing about Twitter is that it limits creeps like this posts’ author to publicly unpacking their pathological self-regard 140 characters at a time.

No.

I would enjoy the generalized improvement in the public discourse. Thanks for your concern though.

I’ll show up as long as I can sit outside and talk about the pennant races instead and come up with dream pitching matchups for the wild card suicide games. Which, if you’re interested: put me down for King Felix v. Corey Kluber in the AL and Syndergaard v. Kershaw in the NL.

Next time, do yourself and everyone favor and don’t say anything. K?

Gah. Shut up, Jim Harbaugh. Just shut the fuck up. Not everyone on Earth thinks all problems can be solved through overexuberant, say-nothing coach-speak platitudes. Jim Harbaugh is the direct male corollary to the talking Malibu Stacy doll.

I don’t mind the premise of ballplayers being more like creatives in terms of their labor. What’s really amazing is to me is that we pay them so poorly as a matter of course. Only in America can you say with a straight face, “Our most talented young people: are we sufficiently impoverishing them?”