Oh my LORD this post was made for me! Little baby dumbbelle was enrolled in a whirlwind torture session, otherwise known as Cotillion, by her well-meaning, former deb mama.

Oh dear. Not sober, never sober. Just pleasantly blurry. There was always a fine line between sloshed and gone, and you NEVER wanted to cross it in front of family members.

I HAVE the say this, though: this isn’t just about men as aggressors. I was sexually assaulted by a fellow female. The assumption that the rape culture narrative only includes men as attackers and women as victims is incorrect and marginalizing to those of us whose assault histories don’t fit the typical profile.

This sheltered little white Southern kid LOVED this show. I can remember watching the re-runs when home sick from school and I just adored it. I think it might have had something to do with the insanely awesome outfits and Whitley. I LOVED Whitley: she was fabulous, she was bitchy, and she sounded like me (though,…

I was at dinner last night at a little local place when CNN started running the video on the TV behind the bar. I felt this kind of disgusted curiosity (HE PICKED UP THE STUN GUN AND PLACED IT OVER MR. SCOTT AS HE IS DYING—-WHAT. THE. FUCK. ), but I couldn’t help but think about the horror his family must feel…

They definitely aren't THE issue, but they are part of it. My point is, if the city places a ban on watering your lawn during daylight hours, etc., residents should follow the ban. It is a totally extraneous use of water during a drought. A garden? Fine. A useless piece of grass? It can wait.

Such a shame! I can remember watching the water-ski show from a boat pulled up ringside. After visiting all the typical FL theme parks as a kid, I can honestly say that Cypress Gardens was at the top of my list. (Though Busch Gardens was always awesome, too.)

SHUT UP. What a small world. And most definitely about the water— we were wayyy outside Lakeland proper.

Shut. Your. Face. I WAS BORN IN POLK COUNTY. LAKELAND TO BE EXACT. WHAAAAAAT.

I grew up in Florida drinking straight-from-the-faucet water. If you haven't ever experienced Floridian well water, it straight up smells like rotten eggs (because of the sulfur). That combined with whatever else is swallowed during a typical Floridian childhood (e.g. copious amounts of salt water, swamp water, egg…

I was looking at the Georgia income spread, and was thinking along the same lines as you. In Atlanta/surrounding areas, $31,000 for a family would be INCREDIBLY difficult to sustain. However, in the more agriculturally-driven south Georgia, I think it could definitely be more sustainable. It would be interesting to…

BE-YON-CEEEEEE!

I'm so glad to know we've made another convert. Bless your heart, sweetheart. <3

Mama is the Queen on the sweetest, most seemingly-benign backhanders.

Oh dear lord, no. That's too trashy. Nothing but spiked Arnold Palmers (they will KNOCK YOU ON YOUR ASS).

Looooots of white denim and Lily prints.

My Southern born-and-bred mama was the QUEEN of throwing shade. I had a cousin (one of mama's "wild" sister's children, Bless Her Heart) who decided at a family reunion (the ONE TIME YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO KEEP YOUR SHIT TOGETHER, BARBARA JEAN) to drink a little too much and couldn't figure out how to open a door clearly…

Agreed! The fear of knowledge is always puzzling to me. Why wouldn't someone want to be able to defend their claims, especially in an apparently very public forum? The hubris that the Food Babes of the world possess is mind-boggling. This deliberate ignorance is honestly terrifying.

To quote the beautiful, talented, and creatively-monickered Sting (*cue swoon*):

Oh. My. God. Tell me this wasn't Governor's Honors Program in GA. In fucking Valdosta. Because, if it was, I'm going to FREAK THE FUCK OUT.