Cole is a decent player, no doubt about it. Better than Messi though? Never in a month of Sundays.

@ArkansasFred: I think I remember that one! The guy who had his shoulder dislocated had some tats, right?

@MarkKelsosMigraine: Yes. Sorry, having re-read my post it was less than obvious.

@MattinglysSideburns: He seems like the sort of dick that would think it cool to call his child 'Coors Light Rombough'/'Jack Daniels Rombough' or some shit like that. And boast about it to anyone who'd listen.

@ArkansasFred: I hope those are random numbers, otherwise you take researching your comments way too seriously. Or you might just have a remarkable memory.

@Matt Sussman: He claims he didn't catch the ball because he was blinded by the lights, hence the sunglasses.

Bros before hoes

So obviously slowed. You can even see people moving in slow motion on the reflection on-screen.

@AzureTexan: +1 for 'heveled'. Terrific.

Dude has more sports-related songs. I like this one.

@Jefferson Short Bus: Wow, never heard that song before! Just heard some say "addicted to what the dick did" and thought it'd be nice to use it. Cheers for the link! So wtf is a wingding anyway?

@duckmouth: Thank you internet. Wingding at 3:11.

@Jefferson Short Bus: *Googles 'wingding'*

Why was she in rehab? Was she addicted to what the dick did?

That's Trevor Nelson, not Anthony whatshisname.

@ClueHeywood: +1

I notice that he didn't smell his hands. He must be very confident in his crotch hygiene, or he just doesn't give a shit. Either way, a little sniff couldn't have done any harm. For shame, young man.

@baeshin: No offence intended (genuinely), but I guess once you are older than 12/13 you probably won't find it as funny.

@MarkKelsosMigraine: +1 shillelagh

"A Dick To Write Home About", by A. Torres