There are two poop stories in the Bible. Actually, one poop story and one poop joke. A prize awaits the person who can identify one or both.

Right on about that Kars-4-Kids jingle. It is a fucking war crime. Every time it comes on the sports radio station I switch immediately to NPR and don’t go back for the rest of the drive. It makes the “Pizza Guy” song that Billy Crystal got demoted for in City Slickers sound like Mozart.

It is because of unions that we have the 40-hour work week, paid holidays and vacations, child labor laws, worker’s compensation, safety regulations, and much more. Police unions do some shitty things, like this asshole and the one in Cleveland, but the decline of the American middle class corresponds almost exactly…

I hope you’re watching the Swedish Wallander and not the British one. I’ve watched both and Krister Henriksson beats the living shit out of Kenneth Branagh.

Why can’t we have juvenile punitive measures? Why does Deadspin hate fun?

Mike Pence (dancing around the homophobic aspects of a “religious freedom” bill he signed in Indiana: “Hoosiers don’t believe in discrimination.”

None of the links work. Breaking news: Sports Illustrated and CNN no longer work together.

“The only monster on this bus is a lack of proper respect for the rules!”

Jesus. I know you hate the Celtics, but watching them come way back in Game 2 against the Wizards and winning in overtime behind 53 points from Isaiah Thomas was pretty fucking good basketball. Just because you’re a Wizards fan is no reason to claim that John Wall’s 3-pointer to win in Game 6 somehow obviates the…

I get it! Floyd Mayweather is illiterate, so the X is his signature! That’s super funny, in a racist and ... wait a minute, that is kind of funny. Never mind.

The link to the prizewinning photo of the fire at Buckingham’s department store also doesn’t work. Pretty sloppy work here by someone.

Um, didn’t Shaq basically steal this bit from Deadspin’s long-running “That’s So Javale” series?

Just imagine this guy was a Patriots fan. Suffered through the Plunkett years, the Grogan years, the Eason years, the Randy Vataha years, the Sam Bam Cunningham years, and then his team got good and won a bunch of Super Bowls. You guys would be shitting all over his obit intead of gushing with emoiton. It’s OK though…

Let’s not forget that Tyler Seguin and Blake Wheeler turned out to be pretty good too.

New German boss: “And what initiatives have you spearheaded in that time?”

I disagree. There was “Led Zeppelin”, and then “Led Zeppelin II”, and then “Led Zeppelin III” and then they realized it was getting stupid and started putting out albums that were untitled or called “Physical Graffiti” or “Houses of the Holy.” So right there you’re proved wrong. Would you have been the record company…

You know who else loved his dogs? Hitler.

+1 Icarus

I think her reason for attending the inaugural ball was perfectly valid. I attended the Nuremberg rallies just because I like the shape of the swastika. I was always more of a Mussolini fascist, and a lukewarm Hitler girl. But then some Jew (I think) hissed at me, and from then on I was like, “Bring on the gas…

Yes, I remember how easily you guys “got over” Benghazi and the election of Obama. Just sucked it up and moved on, as I recall. It was pure class, and all of us stupid libtards should follow your fine example.