You’re making those names up.

Ok...

Albert, you aren’t trying to make the Lakers better.  You’re trying to reboot Grumpy Old Men

I thought the lakers wanted to get out and run. Are you trying to kill Marc Gasol? Is this a conspiracy, and, if so, does it go all the way to the top? 

I hope he was a possession receiver because sending McVay out for a bomb would be in very poor taste

Hell of a fucking game, though.

I stand by your Type-R take. There are dozens of us.

Yeah, but why assume someone is making an earnest effort at self-improvement when you can just take potshots at them?

An excellent counterpoint to my baseball metaphor.

Wouldn’t the front gate technically be a Head Gate?

Kyrie’s PER, VORP, and WS/48 all dropped the first year LeBron came to Cleveland. They did bounce most of the way back the next year, but only to his pre-LeBron levels. They took a major leap in his first season away from LeBron and appear to be doing the same again this year.

I don’t think his growth had much to do…

Other than Kyrie, who definitely improved

There’s only one ball, not counting Lonzo.

Do the Bears shit their pants in the woods?

Hey, 18 months ago that was a very defensible take. 

I’m a Spurs fan, so I vividly remember. The year Kawhi won Finals MVP, he averaged a hair under 18 a game against the Heat (second on the team in scoring, actually). And It’s not like he was doing a ton of Singular Buckets Getting in that series—he shot approximately one billion percent from the floor, but benefited…

In Europe, it’s a Battle Royale with cheese.

He’ll be needing that straw now.

He never had a losing season with Texans any year except last year when they lost their transcendant starting QB. Every other year, you’d struggle to name their starting QB, but they had a winning season regardless. Ask Doug Marrone, Mularkey and Chuck Pagano how easy is that.