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Hopefully this bear feeds on people who use "you guys" before everything they write/tweet/post on the Internet.

Maybe my distant cousin who emailed me recently (and who is a Nigerian prince and is sending me $14,000,000 just for providing him my bank account number) can look into the corruption.

For your handy reference, a diagram of the planet Earth lightly modified for accuracy.

It doesn't top this.

The car explodes and your whole family dies. Except your youngest son in the passenger seat, who's curiosity led him to stick that fateful quarter in dad's transmission in the first place. He survives but is forever scarred, physically by the shrapnel and mentally by the crushing guilt. He later goes on to become an…

In future news:

Muchos gracias.

How does one own $5b worth of cars? Assuming his collection averages out to $1m each, that would be 5,000 cars.

Is that maritime law?

If only this was the electoral map in the last election.....

That's terrible. I didn't think we were going to see anybody hit by a rod ever again.

Insightful. Good research.

If he can leave her for 2 hours and not notice her being gone he is marrying the right woman.

More like Zach Dork.

Don't forget Shad Khan, he's about to be indicted on fraud charges for claiming that the Jacksonville Jaguars are a professional football team

::Josh Freeman signs with Jacksonville Jaguars::

If there's a way to profit from football no one watches, the Jaguars would like to know about it.