She’s only a year or two removed from an Oscar nom.

White people do blackface because they want to do blackface. There are no honest “misunderstandings” on this.

I think, vocally, late night’s best fake Trump is The Kid Mero.

Just say “white people.”

Full disclosure: Little Timmy looks exactly like government tyranny after a couple of drinks.

AND HOW COME THERE’S NO WHITE HISTORY MONTH?!

Props to you for speaking out against the totally-not-made-up Turn Red Stripes Some Other Color movement.

I’m gonna go out on a limb and say that that “day” is any time he’s not in the room.

I’ve found myself fantasizing about how awesome it would be if his KFC diet led him to have an on-camera heart attack.

.

If the Grim Reaper approaches me on my deathbed and offers me the chance to stay alive a bit longer, but only if I spend the time watching 13 Fergie videos, one of which is 11 minutes long, I’ll grab his scythe and finish the job myself.

Oh come on! Justin’s just a good ‘ol boy! He never meant no harm!

Also, they’re running out of stars big enough for the stage and haven’t yet had the Come to Jesus moment about just letting Beyoncé do it every year.

I never noticed how similar my late grandmother’s facial structure was compared to Jane’s, but that Oh no this bitch didn’t expression on Jane’s face just connected the dots for me.

I just want to know whose voices the rest of y’all heard when reading these statements. Mine were:

If he’s just going to be president for mouthbreathing bigots, can the rest of us elect a president of our own?

You tried.

It’s still a notch above being abused by a black woman though, right?

Fuck the death penalty, for exactly this reason.

How do you feel about Lauren Lake’s Paternity Court?

Maybe I’m projecting, but I interpreted that as a panic attack that was made a little less terrifying by Anika’s patience and support.