shut up, NERD

Your points definitely ring true, and seem to be the entire essence of this debate, but, the opposite holds for me. I fear more what I know than what I don’t know.

Was hoping the naïveté was so obviously overwrought that it wouldn’t count as trolling, but alas, Poe’s law. 

Now I’m confused. I read this article in the NY Times a while ago about these Trump supporters who had a corn farm out in Iowa. It really gave me a lot of insight into the true feelings of Trump supporters. Basically, they said that, while they had concerns about Trump’s tariffs, which would hurt their profits, they…

It’s rare for a restaurant to offer free seltzer. I can think of about 3 in all of NYC that I’ve dined at. My guess is this is similar to most other places, if not higher.

Before anymore of you twits say it AGAIN, yes I know clown fish exist. No, they aren’t fucking scary. 

I’m pretty sure Albert spends all day staring at trees and coming up with new ways to describe despair. It’s like if Walt Whitman really wanted you to know you were going to die alone.

Welp, there’s no getting around this one guys. This will definitely, definitely be the thing that finally brings Trump down. Trumpers can put up with a lot, but they will NOT like being lied to, that I can tell you. Their favorite thing about Trump is that “He tells it like it is,” and when they find out he did NOT…

... Dora is an 8-year-old hispanic girl.

Clownfish exist.

Clown in space, because he obviously intentionally sneaks into the spaceship to stalk you. It’s scarier when you’re a target. 

The absolute hard fact of total emptiness and opposite of life really fucked me up.

Think of the embarrassment. Die in space and you get a school named after you. But in the ocean? Your last thought is “God, I’m about to die in the ocean like a complete loser. I don’t even belong here. I bet a stupid fish eats my dick off in like 15 minutes. This blows.”

Well has anyone ever died in Space? The two Shuttle disasters occurred while trying to get to Space or trying to get back. So really once you’re in Space, it’s the safest place you can possibly be, if you think about it.

[slaps the bong out of Albert and Patrick’s hands]

Ocean, no doubt; Patrick is right. The ocean is essentially space for earthlings (because, as he said, most of us won’t go to actual space). It’s vast, all around us, essentially unknown, and unlike space it has stuff that will absolutely destroy you.

Trick question - the scariest thing is consciousness. Gulper McHellfish doesn’t give a shit about space or land or anything, it just eats and fucks and dies (possibly not in that exact order).

The only relevant inquiry is whether its scarier to find a clown in the ocean or a clown in space?  Answer me that, idiots. 

Space is fine. The ocean is scary. If I drift too far from my spacecraft (or it violently succumbs to the vacuum of space while I’m in it), I die fairly painlessly. I slowly lose consciousness and then never wake up, or it happens so fast that I don’t perceive it.

Ocean, no question. But then I have a real phobia of eels.