You’re a fucking cop? That explains it. Or maybe not a cop at all but some kind of security guard.

“Prepared” for what? I refuse to be shit-scared all the time. That’s called paranoia.

I guess the new show’s always stuck in second gear.

Air Koryo: Ilyushins of Grandeur!

“Robert E. Lee” came in second.

Charismatic, no. Talented, no. Unique, almost certainly.

Step one: DON’T PUT IT IN THE MICROWAVE, YOU DRIVELING HEATHEN.

Moar characters! I hope one of them is a muppet

Yes.

“Hey woman-I-just-met! Do you want to come on vacation with me to some remote island?! You do? Great—pack your bejeweled tunics and be prepared to watch me, a perfect stranger, skinny dip and shriek in public restaurants like a Fox anchorwoman on PCP! Good times!”

just like the Crimson Permanent Assurance...

*not available in Japan

Seriously, people.

Same idea. It’s tasteless and you store it in the basement.

This is part of Tea Party conspiracy theory, that Mexicans are planning to take back the territory they lost in the Mexican-American war. It’s ridiculous.

Ahhhhhhhh!

All of them. These people choose to strap themselves inside a vehicle sitting on top of what is basically a large bomb and go into an airless environment which could kill them at any time, sometimes for many months.

So... this technology renders the vehicle safe to drive behind Volkswagens?

Sharks with freakin’ lasers